Afterschool Counselor/Teacher's Work Stories

Know I am a few years late for when these peaked, but figured I would write out some memorable events for my own sake at least, as my memory has been failing. Hope y'all find something of value.

One of my earliest events I had to write paperwork for. This kid had nosebleeds regularly, and was generally unphased by the sight of blood on her face. We were on the playground when this nosebleed happened. As I did before I sent her with a friend to the front-desk in the cafeteria to get some paper towels and use the restroom to clean up. Unlike usual she did not return with her friend. Brought the entire groups back to the cafeteria to the sight of ambulance crew and a fairly 'phased' girl who was quite shaken by the presence of emergency crew. I had a conversation with her, and she explained she had tears of blood. I responded, 'That's awesome!' Probably not the most appropriate response, but she laughed and calmed down a bit after I asked if she felt discomfort. Turns out her sinus cavity was connected to her tear-ducts, an incredibly rare occurrence from what I understood.

On rainy days we have to improvise a game that is both educational, engaging, and withing budget. Not an easy task. We played 'country ball,' a game where students would throw a blow-up globe with all the countries listed on it. Students needed to 1) catch the ball, and 2)name a country not named earlier before 3)throwing it to another student. Students kept getting out as they either missed a catch, or named a country someone else had. This particular game was very intense, and students were desperately finding countries no-one had named before to stay in. This 3rd grade girl was one of 3 still in. She caught the ball, and found a country name she hadn't heard anyone say yet. With the most enthusiastic and innocent voice of a student who knew she was steps away from winning, she yelled out 'Niger!'

Except she didn't say 'Niger.' The class fell silent, some students gasped, and my co-worker excused himself. Poor kid became so nervous. Only thing I thought to say was 'that's... not.. how it's pronounced,' before telling her she was out. Had a private talk with her about what that word meant, and let parents know situation. Otherwise student wasn't disciplined. Found co-worker few minutes after in the next room recomposing himself from laughing. Talked about this incident for years.

Killing time before a field trip for middle schoolers, and 2 kids who I never saw interact before created a memorable event. Boy with autism, usually on computer asks to play a game of charades with cheerleader. Cheerleader complies, and says 'give me a minute to think of something.' Boy says 'oooh, oooh, I know what you are! You're a pretty girl!' Girl blushes, and after composing herself continues the game.

This event happened early in my career, and I have come to regret how I handled it. This kid would cry at the slightest contact of the ball. I don't think it was the ball hitting that got to her, but rather the idea someone would willingly hurt her. My response was to take her aside, and with the ball held place it on her shoulder. I asked if it hurt. 'No.' Next I lifted it and told her I would drop it on her shoulder. Di so, and she seemed to have no reaction. Lastly, I picked the ball back up and told her I would throw it underhand to her, and she should try to catch it. Did o, and it just kinda rolled down her body. She went back to play, and didn't cry anymore. She did seem fairly violent in the eyes when she threw the ball from then on. At the time I convinced myself I was 'toughening her up' for a world that crushes the weak. Come to think now that I robbed the world of a person who would have helped create a more merciful and less cruel world.

For future reference, this reaction is a sign of abuse at home and should be reported to CPS. CPS reports aren't judge jury, executioner deal. Writing one means, if you're lucky an agent will stop by the kid's house and take note of the situation. Even then, rarely is action taken, but can sometimes spook abusers into treating their kids better.

Twins, especially boy/girl fraternal twins were almost always the best behaved in terms of interacting with other students. Their situation leads them to understand the challenges and concerns their gender does not. As such, they are generally more socially aware and are excellent at conflict resolution and overall empathy.
One year I had to re-evaluate my prejudices when I learned my favorite family of kids was undocumented. 3 kids who grew up in fairly hostile environment, but made it through the worst to get a better life here. These students also demonstrate better social awareness and compassion for those in difficult situations. Can't say the same for all kids born and raised here.

I really try not to hold this aspect against them, but only children have consistently had the worst social skills. This is likely due to being the center of attention at home, and not being able to in groups. It's not all only children, and many times their social ineptitude is harmless, but the ones that come from entitled parents create the worst behaved kids. One of these kids parents was the elementary school's volunteer football coach. Her kid was always quarter-back when he was in, and when things didn't go well on the field he would blame teammates. It was like hearing XBOX game IRL. Eventually the league was mercifully disbanded, and that was the last we saw of this particular parent.

Some of the best programs I ran did so off grants. Those grants had to show that students were learning from the program. To do so, this marine-bio program had us administer test at the start and end of the program. Student at the start, with no-info should do poorly. By the end they should do well after going through the program. This program never changed its test, and the same kids would apply to it years in a row. To keep the funding, I explained the situation to the kids, and told them to do poorly on the start of the year test. Then, at end of year I would tell the students to try their best. The reason kids wanted to be in this program, among other reasons was the promise of a field-trip to our local islands that also got them out of school. We kept funding for 5 years, was a great program. I regret nothing.

One of my first posts here was explaining an incident in which middle-school students debated the 'trolley problem.' I would shift from a serious to trivial topic each week. Most memorable debates were the trolley one, best junk food, and a button pressing one.
Students successfully argued that pizza was the best junk food, out of a fairly large group including burgers, ice cream, candy, soda, donuts and chicken tenders. Pizza was settled upon as it could 1) be a full meal and 2) make good leftovers.
The button pressing one was quite intense. The choice was a single button, you push it and you can read everyone's mind. The downside is that everyone can read your mind. Got into really good debate regarding privacy, individual rights, and if pressing the button would turn humanity into a hive-mind (like the Zerg!)

Imgur is very quick to dismiss a potential quote from a kid with a very unoriginal 'and that kid's name? Albert Einstein.' If you think kids aren't aware of their surroundings or media in general you are sorely mistaken. Kids will talk politics, although their ideas usually are re-iterations of the people the respect. That said, when they see an idea or words can hurt someone, they are capable of changing their minds.
This example happened in an old 4th grade class. This was back in 2011 when the tsunami that hit Japan. I was giving the class news of the event. One student kinda laughed. This student was comfortable expressing himself around me. We said, expecting laughter, 'That's what they get for Pearl Harbor!' I knew this kids parents, and I knew where he got this from. I did not laugh. 2 other students asked if there was anyway we could help. I mentioned that the Red Cross was taking donations nearby. We ended up getting an official donation box put at the school due to the students' suggestion.
In terms of calculations, I managed to teach students as young as 3rd grade to play Magic: the Gathering. Can teach more consistently with 4th-8th, but the calculations required to play MtG are within the grasp of fairly young kids.
I really hope Imgur can stop undervaluing the intelligence of kids. If you expect stupidity, you will breed stupidity in the youth. Its not a harmless belief to think kids are not intelligent.
And I get that a large portion of Imgur simply doesn't want to have kids. I am in that group. I just wish that sentiment stopped translating directly into outright disdain and hatred for them.
Except toddlers, they are the worst...

Speaking of the worst...
When I worked afterschool as a counselor, talking with students allowed us to see a bleak view. Students primarily felt anxiety, fear, and hopelessness. A lot of this revolved around the environments their teachers cultivated. Many students felt that if they did not understand a lesson, asking the teacher would result in scolding. Even if the teacher attempted to help, the student would shut down after hearing 'Why weren't you paying attention.' or something similar. This were the mediocre teachers. The worst would revel in their power i.e. 'There is nothing you can do at this point to pass this class.' Teachers who say this are lying, it is entirely within their power to accept late work or make accommodations for struggling students.
As a teacher, most of the time I interact with teachers I hear a constant stream of complaints. I understand this is a coping mechanism for stressful environments, but being surrounded by people who hate their jobs and their lives really kills me. I try to focus on providing the best learning experience for my students. I don't have time to hear you complain how the computer program doesn't automatically give detentions to late students anymore so you have to do it manually now.

I started a DnD group for middle-schoolers, primarily based off Imgur community getting me involved. Students rolled their characters, I spent a week creating a map of a world for students to explore, along with political intrigue and various paths the could take going forward. One kid's parent was Catholic. Group was not allowed to meet during after-school hour before we even started the campaign. Unforgivable.
I have had to write my share of CPS reports over the years. Rather not go into too much detail, but the worst actions I perpetrated against children I know of come from parents.

All of these are groups of anecdotal evidence, but this particular one is just one guy. Had a student get killed in a drive-by shooting a block from the middle-school. Cops were frantically trying to contact the school cop, who was the closest to the scene. Cop never answered calls, he was having an affair down the road.
This info came to light due to school gossip, and was later confirmed by local sheriffs who would train us for school-shooting protocols. They mentioned that often the police send their most problematic to the schools, as they feel they can't cause as much trouble there. Haven't looked at any school cops same since.

Incident that most eroded my faith in educational institutions happened as a result of an administrator. Guy was one of 3 superintendents of elementary school district. Got caught molesting his daughter on school grounds. Found out about it from his son in the most heartbreaking conversation of my life. School had done it's best to make sure parents were unaware of the event. This cover-up was attempted by the school principal, as well as the NPO I was working for. Parents found out eventually, and enough parents transferred students so a teacher had to be downsized the following year. Messed up situation, but in all aspects admin was primarily focused on securing funding, not on the safety of their students.

I'll always advocate for youth, although they can be huge pains in the ass. A lot of y'all should never be near children, and those of you who know that and are making the conscious choice to avoid causing harm, thank you.

Spend too much time with the 'fuck your feelings' crowd and you might end up with collateral damage. Been guilty of this myself, but in person I am trying to be more emotionally intelligent and aware.

Ran into a student I did not get along with, who was accompanied by some of his friends who also knew me. Old job had recently been killed due to district purposefully screwing over my NPO's grant in an attempt to secure the funds themselves. Anyway, conversation starts out pretty normal, and he asks how my job is. His friends go 'oooooh' and I think nothing of it, explain that job is gone and I am working to become a teacher. To mirror his concern I ask how his cousin is doing. His cousin was sent to a hospital due to very rare disease he nearly died from, but had stabilized and recovered last time I checked. His whole group drops silent. He explains he is doing well now, and I tell him have a nice day and tell his family hi.
Realize now that he probably thought me asking about his cousin was retaliatory for asking about my job. He didn't have good memories of me prior, and I don't think he ever will. Still feel bad and although I am generally a callous asshole, I will try my damnedest to be more sensitive going forward.

Growing older sucks, had very idealistic goals as a younger person, and demanded ideologically purity when striving for those ends. Pragmatism is much better mindset that allows for growth and adaptation. 'Did this work?' If no, try an alternative. If yes, improve upon current method. Do not assume all paths to success for each student will look the same. Some require encouragement, some sternness. Some students used notes, calculators, or extra time to finish a test. I let my students, not sure why so many fellow teachers think not giving tools to success makes a better education.

Have some interviews coming up and wanted to put this scenario in words. If a student asks' when will I use this in the future' I may or may not have a good example of how what I am teaching can be a translatable skill in the workforce. Many times I don't and I don't think it should matter. As democratic citizens who elect representatives we are obligated to have broad understanding of our world so that we ideally elect the best people to make the best choices regarding all topics.

If a student gets stuck on a videogame, he won't complain 'when will I use this in real life?' He usual goes right back at it, regardless of applicability. The drive is due to the student knowing since its a videogame, there is a path to success available. As humans, if we are presented with a new skill we have an inherent drive to at least try to master it. Resolving this conflict is not about application, but probability of success. If the student sees no path to success, he will cease to try. Show him a path, and how others have reached the goal and he will proceed. I can't always make students interested, but I can make a path to success available for all.