AGROWERNOTASHOWER
71884
1220
88
This meme captures mine in a nutshell.
Feb 13, 2017 5:22 PM
AGROWERNOTASHOWER
71884
1220
88
This meme captures mine in a nutshell.
ChrisTallant
For your sake, I hope she sure is pretty.
FartyMcPoopyButt
Just give her a slap. It's clearly what she wants.
fdg156
Fuuuuck both parts of this series. Took my ex to see it, I crack up at this shit
v. Most hated person there.
WayneSLuther
You should be pissed she doesn't look like a movie star all the time.
Thordis424
she is not very bright...
Mortalnick
Those movies give women a weird sense of what romance is
Oilyoily
Make her read Sunstone.
frumpster
Tie her up and punch her in the cooch
TobyFromHumanResources
Reminds me of all those folks that got depressed and cried after Avatar because they can't go live with the CGI blue people.
daveeeeeeed
That movie and those books are complete garbage
TysonGoesOutside
my wife read the book and then went on a rant about sexism, rape, patriarchy.... wild times..
gorillaClutch
sounds like you married a child dude maybe it's time to let her grow up
kpxzyv
So she wants you to have sex with her and you kept arguing about it instead?
Chocofreak13
Ask her what she'd think of the movie if Christian Grey was a long-haul trucker earning $40,000 a year.
nabacular
My ex wanted to live out a fantasy from 50 Shades. The one where a English Lit Major gets a good paying job straight out of College
TheDogEnd
"She's a bitch. She's retarded. She's a child. You should hit her, OP. You should divorce her." I'm *stunned* that you're all lonely &single
RedCrescent
I thought you were breaking out some Meredith Brooks for a second.
TheDogEnd
I had to google that reference, but when I did I lol'ed.
Doctorgivemethenews
She just needs disciplined.
royleblue
That series was a contributing factor to the divorce from my ex-retard.
Cptmike
thats sad
royleblue
Sadly true.
Cptmike
just out of curiousity, given i lost someone over a fucking election in which we both voted for the same fuckin white bitch, what happened?
whatupmyknitters
went to see magic mike XXL with my friend. came home super horny, ready to pounce on bf. he got mad that i liked the sex swing scene bc --
whatupmyknitters
--he doesn't want to buy a sex swing. i never asked for a sex swing, just wanted to bang and said i liked that scene. dunno what happened.
designmajor
He's probably insecure/envious of Magic Mike-type masculinity and got defensive instead of using his words. Insecurity can make men strange.
whatupmyknitters
i guess. probably didn't help that he stayed home to play magic the gathering wit his friend while my friend and i went out.
ilovebees
If that's the movie she's comparing it to, then I sure fucking hope real life isn't like the movies.
HoochIsCrazzy
she's pissed you are not a billionaire
SidneyHarbor
Came to comment about how the movie is just about a rich billionaire taking advantage of young girls, which really is like real life.
VioletPulse232
This is why I hate this movie trilogy. It's making a mockery of BDSM. It's such an insult to the lifestyle. *eye roll*
ReptaraMeow
I agree it's going to get a lot of people to join the community and get hurt because they don't understand how BDSM really works.
VioletPulse232
And trying to reason with them is going to awful. When the first movie came out, I was just barely getting into the lifestyle and absolutely
VioletPulse232
Hated how many people said it was bdsm. No it's not and I refuse to watch the movies.
SgtChowdown
Your wife has some very unhealthy views on sexuality, abuse, and BDSM, and y'all should probably have her talk to a therapist?
SgtChowdown
The entire 50 Shades series is basically a guide on how absolutely 100% to never do BDSM. Christian Grey is a rapist and abuser.
whatupmyknitters
it's all portrayed as being very enjoyable, sexy, and romantic. i'm not surprised people are now thinking "this is what romance looks like".
SgtChowdown
I know, I've read the books. I do a series on Facebook where I rip apart shitty erotica.
badhorsechorus
...I need this in my life.
SgtChowdown
as long as you can keep imgur separate from facebook, i can add you so you can read it. i'm considering moving it to Tumblr or another blog
threenothappening
Is she retarded? She must be retarded. You're a nice person for marrying a retard @OP
Heulengeist
She must be hot
mirrorz
"Don't worry scro. There's lots of tards out there living really kick ass lives. My ex wife is tarded. She's a pilot now." -Dr. Lexus
threenothappening
:)
underweargnome
Tie her up and pee in her butt.
randomsausages
Yeah, do that!! Good advice!
robthelob20
That's not what people normally do? Has my Fiancee been lying to me this whole time? I swear if she tries to pee in my butt again...
MrsBananaGrabber
Favorited just for this comment
BigAZNMan
cut a hole in the roof and shit on her.
SynonymOfHarmony
BEERMEBR0
Isn't that how babies are made?
BubbaWunk
Whoa is that a thing???
DoYaLikeDags
Did they do that in the movie?
Sageypie
Apparently there was a bit in the book where the dude rips a tampon out of here and goes whole ham on her. Like pullcord style rip.
stinkingyeti
Wouldn't that like, really hurt?
Sageypie
I have a sneaking suspicion that the author has only been writing about sex second hand this whole time. Most of the stuff seems just wrong.
bendoverrover
SynonymOfHarmony
TokenCobra
+1 for solid advice
ImWithGuitar
Dont you mean liquid?
ImWithGuitar
Dont you mean liquid?
Nessie410
But, through a funnel. That way more urine gets into her butt, and it's less mess.
reflectedsoundofundergroundspirits
And who says romance is dead?
GregorSamsa
Romance isn't dead but the girl I'm romancing in my basement sure is!
Mikeupvotes
"They say chivalry is dead" "Yea, and you bitches killed it."-Dave Chappelle
rabastan
It's chivalry to slam people with a sword.
KickyFootDance
Guilty. I get mad at my GF for not beating up gangs of hoodlums after I watch Jackie Chan movies.
designmajor
All the upvotes for you, friend.
im0nmyway0ut
I wish I could give you more upvotes.
7Forever7Alone7
Just tie her up and spank her pussy
whatupmyknitters
seriously, that's probably all she really wants. some light-medium kink in the bedroom.
LittleKnownOne
*From a billionaire model
whatupmyknitters
if she married him, she's probably not that concerned with the billionaire model part.
LittleKnownOne
Or wants vs ability to obtain
thatsuzychick
Well, the movie and book portray an abusive extremely toxic relationship so i guess if she wants to be abused?
Melanisia
*By a good looking rich guy.
royleblue
And if he wasn't rich and good looking it would be a episode of Law and Order SVU...
Melanisia
The guy is a serial abuser with his own room..... That's an episode of Criminal Minds.
SgtChowdown
Yanno I had this friend who could NOT deal with the fact that Christian Grey does not end up murdering and eating Ana at the end?
SgtChowdown
Like, the whole time he was like "...and NOW is when he snaps b/c he is a serial killer?" "no buddy they get married at the end"
Melanisia
She's the perfect cover for all the hookers he kills.
melimme
have you read all the books ? just curious
randomgibberish
I've read the books and I agree with that statement
melimme
Lol. Fair enough. I enjoy the books as fiction. Everyone has a fantasy. That's the point
dangeroushorses
The problem there being that, to people who actually are into that lifestyle, it wasn't BDSM. It was just regular abusive.
randomgibberish
Not gonna lie, one of the biggest flaws with the story isn't even the bad BDSM, it's the idea that "the right woman can change her douchebag
cinnamonthedragon
Thank you. Time and again I keep telling people this but no 'it's just what they like, it's BDSM'. No. As a submissive, that is abuse.
thatsuzychick
I havent but i have read passages from it and it all horrible. It sounds like a 12 year old who doesn't understand BDSM wrote it.
dinobots56
It isn't the best representation but in the book he discusses how he isn't a dominant he is a sadist.. So it isn't as bad as people make it
melimme
I'm not condoning abuse in any form. But I'm just saying it is a fictional book and should be viewed accordingly.
gothraki
You'd probably have more credibility if you actually read the book being discussed
thatsuzychick
Ive read enough of them.
melimme
I'm not condoning abuse in any form. But I'm just saying it is a fictional book and should be viewed accordingly.
thatsuzychick
I agree for the most part but normalizing his actuons in society can lead to a lot of unhealthy relationships and abuse.
melimme
But to say that is also like saying pretty much any movie is unhealthy They're movies aren't they? Which we can choose to watch or not
melimme
But to say that is also like saying pretty much any movie is unhealthy They're movies aren't they? Which we can choose to watch or not
Clockworkdancerobot
Introduce her to a proper movie on the subject maybe? "The Secretary" (2002)
SmellOfMonkey
Or Antichrist, or A Serbian Film
IKeepChangingMyUsername
No no no no no. That movie is nearly as bad. That's certainly not serious BDSM.
WhenYouOnlyHaveABeardandAWig
One of my favorites
SauceyWench
My favorite
Ringshadow
Yeah nah, still a bit abusive. Try the graphic novel "SunStone."
whatupmyknitters
i fucking love SunStone
YourUsernameOrPasswordIsIncorrectPleaseTryAgain
.
lurkvoter
It's def. got issues, but it's also a really cute & romantic well done movie. (Which is fiction, so real life shouldn't try to emulate it.)
griphyn220
Right. It's a story, not a how-to guide.
MelodiousDissonance
Hell yes! Awasome story, and really pretty outfits XD
nasreal
1 Sunstone is amazing!! I've always felt like Secretary was a little creepy given her underlying mental illness. It's sort of ambiguous as..
nasreal
2 to how deep the issues surrounding the self harm go, and in the movie it helps her deal with the issue. But it still feels like he's...
nasreal
3 just taking advantage of her a bit in the beginning. Especially how he somehow has a sixth sense that she'll be totally into it, so he...
nasreal
4 just treats her like shit and then spanks her. I mean, fucking blurry line of consent there. Movies give people an extremely unrealistic..
TheTimper
What I always say when someone brings up 50 shades. Same plot, even same last name, but done in a good way
Snooj
Also it didn't start out as Twilight fan fiction.
Gonnaderpya
Cept it still portrays it as something associated with mental illness
DesertBloom
Well wasn't greys whole issue supposed to be his mom whored him out and he's all mentally broken or some shit?
nclu
Spent a lot of time in the scene, it's still pretty common there
Gonnaderpya
It is but damn both movies have it basically synonymous with being nutters.
CaptainGrowler
There may be a logical reason
CaptainGrowler
There may be a logical reason
Rezol
It's almost as if SOMEONE saw that movie and decided to write a book based on it.
GIHunter6
50SoG is actually a winky Twilight fanfic, but with names changed for copyright reasons.
whatupmyknitters
i thought 50 shades was inspired by twilight (seriously... it's bella+edward fanfic)
Rezol
I know. So we're talking a Twilight version of Secretary.
WaitHowDidIGetHere
I had a girl break up with me because it wasn't like a Disney romance.
KaylaAnnMeow
The sad part...I have 2 friends who are dating who practically portray a Disney romance. It's kind of gross lol
Belckan
"WHERE ARE THE ALL THE GOOD MEN BWAHHH!
whatupmyknitters
i have a few friends that unfortunately think this is a reasonable expectation. i'm like, nah girl, unless you have forest creatures making-
whatupmyknitters
-your bed and cleaning your house while you sing, you gotta be okay with a dude who isn't "prince charming". he's gonna fart sometimes, he's
whatupmyknitters
--gonna not clean up after himself sometimes, he's gonna forget to text/callyou back sometimes. just like you do. because you're both human.
TheArrestingAbhorrentArrantAbominableAlliterator
You won that breakup.
warslinger
Stop dating 14 year olds
WaitHowDidIGetHere
That was 6+ yrs ago
PandaSexpress
I request more details in what she was expecting
Furryboots
Please
DoctorSnakebeast
Songs were low budget and a little pitchy. Only animal companion was the back half of a raccoon. No wicked stepsisters.
Tassyr
Likewise.
WaitHowDidIGetHere
She just broke up with her boyfriend, I worked with her she was hot we went on a few dates then one night we both got drunk and banged. 1/?
WaitHowDidIGetHere
A few days pass we finally talk about it and she was so upset and emotional crying saying she "doesn't know" and said she wanted a Disney2/?
HoochIsCrazzy
Tell her to go live in the woods with 7 midgets then eat a poisoned apple.
WaitHowDidIGetHere
Relationship, I literally said WTF are you crazy and she walked away as the other women I work with gave me nasty look and tried to calm her
Pangs
You hooked up and she walked away. She didn't break up with you.
KimchiQueen
I think she just regretted banging you, dude