Florida Man Dump

May 29, 2017 8:16 AM

coldestbeerintown

Views

169806

Likes

2826

Dislikes

96

Edit: I've never imagined that this would hit the most viral. Thanks imgur!

No one is going to talk about the Florida man dying after winning roach-eating contest?

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

So much crazy in one place!

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

For everyone wondering why https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tRs-7_BsYNc

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Floriderp

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

I found out that the reason Florida has crazy stories is because there are different laws about the info that can be provided about crimes.

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

2/3 of the population in Florida is from somewhere else. Congratulations, you just played yourself.

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

We need a Dexter to deal with THESE Florida men

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

Uses taco as I'd . Lmfao

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Oh Florida Man

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

It's almost like Florida is to America, what America is to the rest of the world...

9 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 7

Ah, another beautiful homage to my home sweet home!

9 years ago | Likes 84 Dislikes 3

#20 Sits in a bar and says. Let me tell you a story about how my ex chocked on mah dick and died.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

#1 Is sad, you can barely make out he didn't actually mean to, and was surprised when it happened.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#4 Is that Ted Mosby?

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

+1 ctrl+f'd specifically for this

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Come to Florida for the bath salts, stay because you're exiled from all the other states.

9 years ago | Likes 119 Dislikes 4

Very glad I'll be ordered to leave the state in eight months.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

Bye

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Florida, America's purgatory.

9 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 2

And Heaven's Waiting Room... because of all the old fuckers who retire here and CAN'T FUCKING DRIVE, GET OFF THE ROAD!

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

If these are real, I'm beginning to believe in eugenics.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

That's definitely the face u make after u poop on everything

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I secretly like to think it's all the same guy

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

The aligator one was sad. He kept the animal tied up and blind folded for a month.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

As someone who just moved to Florida, I am concerned

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

9 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 1

#2 wasn't funny at all...

9 years ago | Likes 17 Dislikes 3

Idk it's kinda funny

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 4

I can hardly read it

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

look at his face though. "They just... Just came off...."

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 2

v

9 years ago | Likes 18 Dislikes 0

Can someone please exlain? No hands. No legs. Armed and on the run?

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Armed= has weapons, on the run= escaping/evading police

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

It's actually a really uplifting story

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

#1 is fake

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 1

I actually felt sorry for him

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Well yeah, imaginary friends aren't real.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

...well played.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Where else would you keep a handcuff key if you're expecting to be handcuffed?

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Florida Man. Worst. Superhero. Ever.

9 years ago | Likes 78 Dislikes 3

Truly, the hero we deserve.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Lets be fair. Florida Man is also the worst Villain ever.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Or best... it's hard to tell sometimes.

9 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 1

Some Floridians are absurdly proud of their states reputation.

9 years ago | Likes 41 Dislikes 2

I imagine that nobody wants to fuck with you when you say you're from Florida, kinda like saying you're from Detroit.

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 1

It's more like, "I survived Florida".

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

You fuckin bet, I live in the biggest garbage fire of all time. Also other states probably have the same amount or more crazies but 1/2

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 3

Florida is a state that publicly releases all police reports so all of our craziness gets known. On the other hand south Florida is a mess

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

9 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 1

Most people that are actually from here have "flogrown" stickers on their car and are absolutely retardedly proud of it. It's sad :(

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 3

I have never in my life seen that. Is that a Miami thing? Sounds like a Miami thing

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Nope, I know plenty of natives including myself, that would never sport anything like that on their cars, clothing or otherwise. *Shudder*

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Ok, at the risk of coming across like a fuckin idiot, is any of this real? Cos fuckin hell America, if it is, Australia is CONCERNED.

9 years ago | Likes 454 Dislikes 4

Yes. Every single one actually happened in Florida.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 2

It is all real. and no one likes that florida is a thing,

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Yes it is but don't you put this on all of us! That's just Florida ok!? The rest of us aren't like this for the most part!

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Yes. Yes it is. I was down the street for the dick chocking incident.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Finally made it out of florida...it is the land of weird.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Hide your kids, hide your crocodiles

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

Florida man, the only thing more dangerous than Australia's wildlife.

9 years ago | Likes 10 Dislikes 0

Haha bullseye mate

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

TLDR: FL has open-record laws. We're definitely crazy fucks down here, there's just easier access to our records than some other states. :)

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

I've lived here (Florida) almost a year and sadly, I can believe these.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 2

No-one is more fucked up than the US of A. Not even the Murder Continent.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

WE'RE NUMBER ONE! WE'RE NUMBER ONE! WE'RE NUMBER ONE! WE'RE NUMBER ONE! WE'RE NUMBER ONE! WE'RE NUMBER ONE! WE'RE NUMBER ONE!

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

So are WE O.O

8 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I'd believe it. On my last trip to Disney World we decided to venture away from the Disney property at 1am, that was a 1/2

7 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

mistake. We stopped at a gas station and got bombarded by methed out hookers. I think most everyone everywhere is on meth in Florida. 2/2

7 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I believe @OP checked each source before putting each in the dump, I checked some and I can confirm, these are real. and it scares me.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

wonder what our equivalent is ...??

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

As someone who lives locally to some of these... they've had coverage, as recent as last week.

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Some are real so are fake. Like the having sex with a gator is fake

9 years ago | Likes 31 Dislikes 3

#1 is fake

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Imaginary friends are real, damnit! They're real!

9 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Pretty sure #3 is fake as well since a professional news site wouldn't say "dick and balls".

9 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 1

What exactly do you mean professional news site? Cus ive seen some pretty shitty news sites with language like that

9 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

I don't know if that one is fake but there are really people who fuck gators.

9 years ago | Likes 9 Dislikes 0

And if Australia is concerned the UK is concerned cause it takes a lot to concern Australia.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

If the UK is concerned then Canada is also concerned because it takes a lot to concern thos bloody POMMIES!?!??!&$#_(sorry meds wore off eh)

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Amen bro

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Police are required to report everything to media or something.

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

They're real, but don't blame the rest of us for Florida. It's a goddamn circus down there.

9 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 3

It's worth it to once a month look up Florida Man on Google news. 25-50% are fucked up like this. And it's only Florida that does it...

9 years ago | Likes 192 Dislikes 5

Outside the coasts and the cities, Florida is deep, DEEP South. Like, Alabama deep. And Alabama doesn't sit on a hundred drug pipelines.

9 years ago | Likes 24 Dislikes 2

I always loved Florida because when I visited it was Disney world or ft Meyers or Tampa. But the rest of it is a flaming trash heap

9 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 5

You can't say it's a flaming trash heap if, as you said, you've never been there.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

It's just easier for reporters to get info on crimes in Florida. There's dumb dick digglers doing dummy dont's daily everywhere

9 years ago | Likes 109 Dislikes 1

Dirty deeds done dirt cheap.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

beautiful alliteration

9 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Dr. Seuss?

9 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I just want to say: Dumb Dick Digglers Doing Dummy Don'ts Daily. I love you.

9 years ago | Likes 41 Dislikes 0

Dude, shit like this happens all over the world. The state of Florida just has a law where the press can publish peoples arresting info.

9 years ago | Likes 103 Dislikes 5

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Not sure if you're serious...

9 years ago | Likes 14 Dislikes 7

It's true... I've spent the last year in FL & haven't seen anyone have sex with an alligator. I am getting the fuck out though lol

9 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 4

I'm from SE Louisiana, and spent a year in Florida, in the middle of my traveling days. It was the closest that felt like home lol.

9 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

It's really not that bad. I'm just from NY and can't handle the summers here lol...I will miss being tan forever though.

8 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

He/she is serious

9 years ago | Likes 18 Dislikes 1

I'm referring to the "Florida law" they mentioned. The 1st Amendment permits this, not one state. Florida is in no way unique here.

9 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 4

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9 years ago (deleted Feb 7, 2024 2:06 AM) | Likes 0 Dislikes 0