Yoda1PositivityStar
125009
1806
28
Oct 26, 2021 11:24 PM
Yoda1PositivityStar
125009
1806
28
HoneyBadgersAreBadAsses
Bravissimo, capo.
Iamyourcaptainnow
When my grandpa died a whole lot of people showed up that nobody of us knew. Turned out he had a bunch of kids with 3 other women.
StorytellingSalem
“We’ll avenge you by noon tomorrow. No one will even know what happened.”
lastime
When I died, a bunch of poeple came to my funeral dressed as hookers and payed tribute, it was funny watching them from down below
Richter12x2
Just get a bunch of guys in dark glasses and suits to show up, stand quietly at the back, and then leave.
88wut
All of them in DND cosplay
Nandortherelentless
Kyrorayne
nekuth
At this stage, I'd like a funeral where people turn up
sevrono
I want the coffin dancing guys
JesusofMethlehem
Tony lazuto says hello
Blizky
What was that?
zanaria
I want to be cremated and sprinkled on the food after the funeral. After eating everyone gets a card saying "Bite me. Oops too late..."
TwoWolvesHighfiving
Idk. It'll be hard to believe unless you have strong Italian heritage. Still a bit funny.
deaddogsmuggler
I want a G.G. Allin funeral
stingingnettlegurlL7
I’m putting this in my will to be executed in secret. I love this.
Sporkeldee
There was an article where this 80 something year old grandma had several hells angels show up in respect. Turned out she was their tailor
Sporkeldee
And fit/sewed their patches/vests for them for decades and the family was none the wiser.
Atonic1959
poser in life, poser in death.
CommsAreDown
MercerSkye
AnonOmis1000
Nah nah, you gotta get Italians, Hispanics, Chinese, and Russians in different groups calling you boss
MomWithHiddenTats
This
Superchief86
Nah. Each of them says nothing. One person from each group approaches your grave and drops in a key. Then they all just walk away.
cosguy224
What?
Superchief86
Exactly.
unkiereamus
Only group calls you boss, the rest say they're just there to make sure you're really dead, then they all stand around glaring at each other
camn333
Then one of them stands up during the eulogy and says "he's gone now, no one will stop the coming war", then they all walk out.
Brandy321
hey boss, why do we need to be Italian?
quantumphear
Because the whole operation is run by Tony Lazuto.
RtsWillH1Mself
CorneliusTunt
Because this is...la via.
Superchief86
?
Jawesome19
Mobsters, etc.
macpall
Ayye oo, cause it makes sense
PlagueVector
All Japanese works too…
Zaranthan
If you're not Japanese, nobody would buy it.
CthuluChan
What just because I'm black I can't be Yakuza?
opibucket
Jacuzzi
SquireRamza
There is a (really fucking good) anime with a mobster called Jacuzzi Splot
JHEverdene
I once got "Jacuzzi" confused with "Yakuza" - ended up in hot water with the Japanese mob...
captincorpse
XeononSolomon
When my grandfather died a bunch of people showed up to his funeral that no one knew and they all called him Joey. He hadn't gone by Joey
ImSorryImgurImNotAPerfectSpellerPleaseDontHateMeForever
I choose this guy's grandma Joey
M4Firefly
Probably just his friends with Alzheimers
imno0or1
Same thing for a distant great uncle of mine turns out he was in the kkk :| so not nearly as cool and actually quite disgusting
DefinitelyNotKenM
XeononSolomon
Since his time going in and out of prison for whatever involvement he had with the Irish mob.
BHPaperstacks
Big Time Spamoni Joey. He was the best! Never said a word about nuthin'
zerkalot
I still miss Joey…
mirata
Not to you he hadn’t
CutChemist
Holy shit. My gpa, Joel, just passed weeks ago and I swear we had this happen at the funeral. People the family didn’t know.
CutChemist
“Joey” being his name. I keep the namesake. We have fed’s and dealers in our fam. I’m the latter.
mikeatike
Maybe you guys are cousins?
majorpurpskurp
Username checks out
CutChemist
Though I am a Chemist and I am Cut
amarangel
Neosporin will heal that right up.
CutChemist
Not really, O.G. CutChemist is an awesome old school DJ. I “borrowed” this name 15 years ago. Does NOT check out.
jfred325350
Suuure.