friendlessmole
126051
2412
207
Sep 8, 2017 5:14 AM
friendlessmole
126051
2412
207
thepartypooperscooper
Crap, i think i have favorited this three times now.
IcommentMostlyWithGifs
My hero
jonhnefill
This is probably from the dawn of the internet (along with the lighthouse story), but I will never stop loving this story.
ASecondChance
then you get this https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2017/aug/21/us-destroyer-uss-john-s-mccain-damaged-after-collision-with-oil-tanker
TheGreyKnightsBANNED
Give that mother fucker 2 successor chapters. Now.
Captainbetray
I would like to be friends with that dude.
luridftw
I didn't read it, might be the laziest thing I've done
ContentDeputy
Lots of words but good story
drumlino117
Laziest thing I've done today is not read all that
Sixinchnipz
Only the fourth time this epic fakeness has circulated since I joined imgur. 5 dildos out of 7 sloppy vaginas.
taself
the man is a god :)
JohnnyDeformed
True story
aryanishan
If you want a difficult task to be done, get the laziest guy. He'll find the easiest way to do it.
youngmountaingoat
Excellent point. Although you run the risk that he won't do it at all.
SelfPleasureRobot
Oh, it must be Friday. This shit posted again.
Jodanoe
RYG420
This is the all time best
michaeljscott
Commenting this from my phone
bradleylibralesso11
I once walked into a pizza place and ordered a pizza for delivery so I could be driven home with the pizza
andergriff
why not just order a delivery from home.
5knotcans
This might explain the spate of collisions.
XappBrannigan
Fabinator
This is absolutely brilliant!
AnnunakiMoon
Ok ok settle down
sunyudai
NO!
AbuMKatt
I will never not love this story
RavenBlue
Great Story. Used to work with an Ex-Navy guy that told stories like this all the time.
ideologist
I hate that the author calls it a zombie bagel at the end, it irks me. The Officer is a zombie with a bagel, it's not a zombie bagel.
SpicyLava
A dog treat is a treat for a dog, right? A zombie bagel can be a bagel for a zombie.
ErinWhatsitsName
The bagel was bitten by a zombie of course it turned.
AbuMKatt
Good point, but still a hella fun read