thatoneguywithcripplingsocialanxiety
56086
1057
80
It was a beaufitul day in southern california so I thought a light job should be in order since the college bod has been sneaking up on me. I had felt fine all day and successfully jogged to the nearby beach with no issue. On my way back I had felt fine and had no issues, then it came. I felt a small bit of gas so I thought no biggie Ill just give it some help out, but I had miscalculated. A shart met me instead of the expected fart, and I sank into panic. My cheeks were sliding every step and I was now sprinting home like a cowboy. It wasnt for another 15 min of running that I finally got home and cleaned up, now clean of fecal matter but dirty with shame. This was the first time I, a 20 year old man, shat his pants since diaper days. I hope imgur finds humor in my defeat.
DavidsPlayToy
Never trust a fart!
Talosdoingcalc
Never happened to me, but it happens.
PotassiumLover
You took a calculated risk, but man are you bad at math
OverwatchOfficial
died at shart. I've never heard that before.
BrandenHaluszka
BigMistakeBigHUGE
savagepenguin
Half way through?!?! That would have been the end of most people's jog. You are a real trooper!
KristusApollo
My wife made the mistake of grocery shopping with a bout of the 'rhea. She had to abandon the cart leaving a trail of shit out the store.
2sday
Lucky bastard, it's cold as balls in SF! Although, sorry you endured a shart, man
unhealthy12118
Healthy living is just the slowest possible way to die.
Grinchoats
Running is nature's laxative.
Didijustshtmypants
Happened to me on a run once or twice
dahakoge
Many a brave runners have gambled on a fart and lost..
Golduneye
Never trust a fart
Crashdlanding
You're 20. It won't be the last.
RawrLouder
Ah. Runners shits. Happens to the best of us. But not me because I'm far from the best.
KakAlakin
Never trust a far after mile 3
ZombieDK
Never trust it
cogs
NEVER. TRUST. A. FART.
SadieJones11
It happened to me once while I was working. I had to ask my boss to let me call my dad to bring me new pants and underwear. I was 18...
NotaMormonbutlookslikeone
As a freshman in high-school I was in ROTC and we had a competition I was doing sit-ups and I happened to been having some problems with (1)
NotaMormonbutlookslikeone
My stomach but I was always near a bathroom and not busy but this time I was in the middle of a sit-up competition with my C.O. holding (2)
NotaMormonbutlookslikeone
My legs and I gave out 2 terrible farts while doing sit-up's. Safe to say she wanted nothing to do with me afterwards. Also a girl did (3)
NotaMormonbutlookslikeone
365+ sit-ups, the Army veteran counting gave up. She wasn't this ultra fit girl either, she was average and was aiming for 90 sit-ups
SmellOfMonkey
Welcome to the club
KibblesandBitchTits
like my grand papi always said "never trust a fart"
spookysexyskeleton
papabless
kasaku
This site gives me unreasonable expectations of how often sharts happen. They're like the quicksand of imgur.
ATimeTravellingRobotFromTheFuture
It's happened to us all and it'll probably happen again. Except me. I'm a robot and my furnace destroys everything I eat.
trickee
The jostling from running can do that. It's a thing. http://running.competitor.com/2014/03/training/why-do-i-have-to-poop-when-i-run_70934
PrincessNakedMoleRat
Never sharted in my life. Sounds awful.
mostlyimjustlurking
A light JOB for the college bod.
ErinFromTheOffice
Shit happens
WasThatAFartOrAShart
Yes. Yes it does. Username relevant.
Iamalleandro
Some-times
locotico83
Dammit u beat me to it
programmatically
@erinfromtheoffice
ErinFromTheOffice
Yes?
programmatically
you said wanted to be mentioned
GODofHUNGER
I'm just replying to this comment because your bio says you like it. So..yea
ErinFromTheOffice
I do indeed.
ChicksDigTrucks
chrisharddick
Well shit
ChicksDigTrucks
Quite.
MindlessGuyAtTheHelm
If age has taught me anything it's to never help a fart, EVER! (unless you're on the toilet).
skruttet
Or only help by opening, but without pushing.
Whirlednews
*never trust a fart
jtb1313
An addage I live by, just yesterday I had a suspicious fart so I went to the toilet turns out I had the squirts
iggins01
I think I am reaching the age where all farts are extremely untrustworthy