HalfYourMemesAreMine
225947
5440
158
Feb 6, 2018 6:07 PM
HalfYourMemesAreMine
225947
5440
158
tibris
good guy wolverine, knows the kid never had sex and took one for the team. or is that not what happened?
GigavoltFox
That kid looks 13 and 30 simultaneously
GifsAreMyFetish
Tagged as „funny“?
iwishjtmoneywasstillavailableitsmyoldvideogamemoniker
Fuck this one is always painful.
FiddleParadiddleTwiddle
TasosPapadopoulos
Man, i know wolverine is a short ugly dude but damn, this artwork is hideous.
littlegol
So just to be very clear Logan killed him right
evolution4407
Yes.
Zher01
Ok but why is that funny tag over there?
HalTheMisinterpretivePornStar
crorse
Touching but the writing was sloppy. Just hit puberty, but dating, driving cross country and looking at colleges?
MeeseInABucket
Maybe he meant a sort of mutant puberty
Adthay
I think "hit puberty" is met as a analogy to the gene kicking in, the beginning of puberty for human males is like 12 at the latest
manimatr0n
You realize that fiction isn't obligated to be Always Literal All the Time, right? Sometimes characters can use approximations.
crorse
Ate you saying it's good writing?
AnythingMuchShorter
If he's emitting toxins cant they just put him in a space suit? I guess the cover-up is the main part?
shonasof
And if anything went wrong, hundreds more would die. Then the mutant hunts begin. Hard choice, but as Logan said there's a bigger picture.
AwkwardGirl4691
HairyPicklePuller
About to look at colleges, and hit puberty last night? Damn smart kid or late bloomer?
Counterfit
Late bloomer, I guess. Hence the driving cross country
Mikeiller
Or Logan was wrong on that point. it's not always puberty that sets off mutations
AreThoseMyPants
I guess he simplified. It's not like puberty "hits" and that's it.
narniasreal
Logan could've at least had sex with the boy, since he never got to do it with his GF
DinoHunter56
Dude......I was thinking the same thing
AdamGenesis
That's so Kevin Spacey.
Nekkolombus
kinky
YourBackup
Took me six pages to realize I was reading it right-to-left like manga.
ShouldersDeepInAHorse
Or a hentai...
solarspyder
coolbandana
I'm stealing this. Thanks
FiddleParadiddleTwiddle
SwordsToTheSkyWeRideAtDawn
I Wonder How Many Mutants Agent Wolverine Has Had To Kill
GTalmighty
At least the same amount of capitalized words in your sentence.
SwordsToTheSkyWeRideAtDawn
Eleven. The Number Is Eleven. That Seems Very Low. I Am Sure The Dark Side Of Canadian Military Had Him Off Dozens and Dozens Of Children
GTalmighty
I said "at least"
ngoffred42
This comment made my day
KGrizzy
Wait....did logan kill the kid?
defaultentry
No, he sent the kid to live on a farm in the countryside.
KGrizzy
Oh thats nice, for e second i thought he killed him
ChrisMorray
Yeah. And the kid was aware he would. Neither wanted it, but both understood it had to happen.
GhettoGIFguy
Did Charles send Logan to kill him, or did Logan decide to change a rescue plan?
GrimdogX
There is another comic where it's revealed that there are mutants which cannot be allowed to live because of powers like this.
Imalwaysready
Straight up pre-planned teen murder.
akalien
To kill him
HoneNathan
"OK professor its done" "Thanks, only you could have put the power suppressor collar that is CONSTANTLY a plot point on him." "Ummmmm..".
Mumalot
\m/ PERMANENT POWERSUPPRESSION! \m/
eazolan
Or, you know, there's that cure. They did a whole movie about it.
HoneNathan
Or all those mutants that have power cancelling mutations. Or the hazmat suits they put on the other death radiating mutants, or...
Fedotia
So how's the teen still alive if he melts all organic tissues with his gas?
bootninja
same reason a scorpion doesn't kill itself with its stinger
mahgaminshit
Idk maybe part of his ability included immunity to it. Like Cyclopes' eyes or that frost guy's skin or quicksilver' reflexes.
Fedotia
I find it weird he makes people and bananas pop out of existence, not even a residue, just the -organic- cotton clothes left in place.
Lurkingoff
I see this posted almost quarterly. Always read it. Always upvote it.
thedrunkmic
Same
HalfYourMemesAreMine
Thank You, I've personally never seen it here before but thanks for the upvote
LivnLern
Hold up, all that research for mutant suppression and control and they couldn't try to save this kid, even give him a choice or a chance?
manimatr0n
It's the Ultimate Universe, doesn't follow the 616 timeline at all.
corvoalchemist
The cure was being worked on by the government. Plus the cure didn't really work it just suppress the powers and had some nasty side effects
GuyPrice
not worth the effort and risk, you couldn't even bring him to the lab
shonasof
It's sad, but if _anything_ went wrong, so many people would die. It's the big picture that logan was talking about.
GrimdogX
I don't think at this point in-universe they had a surefire cure, it's canon that Logan had to do this for several years earlier on in X-Men
manimatr0n
It's "canon" for the ultimate Universe, main 616 universe hasn't done an on-page storyline like this.
GriffithTheHero
So what happens to the kid?
ChopSake
Logan had his way
BopNiblets
He operated on him with his claws, kid is super duper! ????
Neometal
The kid said that he and her gf had never... Well, Logan helped him become a man.
TechKiddz
Mikeiller
They sent him to a nice farm far away and everybody was happy and everything was fine.
Bethem909
He Ded.
suppafly
He went to live on a farm.
Metallica93
"Look at all the rabbits, kid."
Phoenixfighter43
“Imagine all the bunnies Lenny, look down at the river and just imagine all the animals”
ImmaculateDegenerate
Logan killed him.
RenegadeSci
Shhhh, 4chan people are sensitive.
Pcakester
I only figured this out on the third read. :(
AliBarber
I love this comic but I hate the fuck out of the artist who drew wolverine like a down syndrome kid that got hit in the face with a shovel.
LiamNeesonOfficial
"Are you saying downy kids arent sexy?" -Cathy Newman
DiabloGrandeArts
Thanks, I was trying to put that into words, haha
Emperorsteele
Maybe the artist got this timeline confused with the time Wolverine really DID lose his nose for a spell.
TaintGrundleGooch
Why couldn't he be trained or like made armor to suppress his powers?
shonasof
Two reasons, some powers are on all the time, like Rogue's touch. And if _anything_ went wrong, even more people would die. Big picture.
AlGoreSexTape
This is also Ultimate Marvel, which is a different continuity than "real" Marvel. Professor X is a lot more Machiavellian.
AlGoreSexTape
"Regular" X is deeply concerned with the welfare of his students. Ultimate X sees them as pawns in the struggle to advance mutant rights.
Douglasth
Was the beer poisoned? I feel like that would have been the lesser evil...
EtherealRune
poisoning is not as gentle as in movies
Douglasth
There's a wide variety of poisons though. I'm guessing there must be at least one that's better than getting impaled or decapitated.
Loutrezilla
Neither is getting stabbed.
EtherealRune
I don't think I've ever seen that portrayed as gentle in a film. Also arguably wolverine could probably make it close to painless as pos
CaptainLamprey
You tagged it as "funny". It is most definitely not. +1
SilentScreamsX
I dunno, I thought it was kind of funny that Wolverine looks like someone smashed his face flat with a shovel.
CrimsonReaper1985
While I agree with you, it all depends on one's sense of humor. I'm sure there's some sick wanker that laughed at this.
Nostradamuswaswrong
CookingwithMike
Hidden joke! The McDonald's bag. It was the only thing he found to eat because it wasn't organic. :D
Imalwaysready
http://media3.giphy.com/media/12sRQ2poUaVLwI/giphy.gif
RedKing85
What's that from? :)
panvint
Watchmen
RedKing85
Thanks!
QueenCousland
Watchmen. Good movie, better comic.
RedKing85
Thanks! I've read the comic, didn't see the movie.
admiralbenson
I feel that Charles will also be crying onto cerebro console as they speak
DreadCaptainGaybeard
More likely he'd be sitting in Cerebro, looking at 2 mutant signals, then see one just wink out. He takes of the helmet, takes a quiet 1/2
DreadCaptainGaybeard
2/2 moment, then leaves and goes to teach a class and try to act like nothing happened.
Fairdinkums
Maybe, but its necessary and would have ordered Wolverine to do this. And possibly several other times as well
MyBedroomIsSiberia
Yo where's that story prompt subreddit??
johnzaku
Charles didn't even know, it was Samuel Jackson that ordered it.
JudgementalMan
really?
johnzaku
Well, Nick Fury, but yeah. There’s a scene later on where Fury’s waving his guvmint dick around at chuck and logan says “member the kid?”
p75369
I doubt an order was needed. Probably just a "Logan...", "Yeah..."
Mikeiller
"... and whatever happens, don't tell me about it."
miados
and luckily logan is probably the one person who chuck can't casually poke into the mind of to see if he ends up curious.
Misfire5150
Why not? Not big on comics. Metal skull keep him out or something?
Nize426
Would've thought they could make some sort of contraption to contain the kid.
GrimdogX
Too high of a risk, kid Vaporizes life within a mile or so just by existing.
Guyonbench
More then likely. They made a suit for Hazmat, whos powers were similar.
oopsIdroppedmypocketpasta
he'd probably starve to death fairly quickly, considering vaporizing organic matter is his deal.
Nize426
Well, roasted Wolverine seems to be on the menu.
oopsIdroppedmypocketpasta
does Wolverine's flesh heal when separated from the main body?
totalwiener
But then what kind of life is that? Trapped in a tomb because you kill everything in sight. Might as well spare the poor kid from that.
Nize426
I was thinking more like a space suit type deal that would give mobility and filter the toxins. Killing him works too if guess. Budgets :/
LiRivera
They did that to Kitty Pride in one verse. I think ultimately she decided to just phase apart, purely because she couldn't solidify anymore.
blobti
Do You know what verse, i would like to read it
LiRivera
It was an alternate take on the Breakworld/Return arc. I'm not sure what universe, I read it ages ago. Sorry.
cable7193
*looks at first panel* "oh yeah. This is the one where everyone dies. I remember this one"
RTK4740
Devastating when I read it. Wow. Ultimate x-men.
Nykidemus
Yeah. I knew what was coming and I read it anyway. It's been that kind of day.
Klaaism
And here's the feels again.
TaintGrundleGooch
He couldn't be saved at all?
QueenCousland
If he were a main character, they'd have found something.
AsianDad
You can all you need is to put him in a space suit and give him a underground bunker, pressurized of course. Or kill him to save PR disaster
housev1l
Talk about silent but deadly!
Kitbash
If there was a means to 'save' him, it would involve altering his DNA to remove any possibility of the mutation occurring again which 1/2
Kitbash
may mean that they would have to alter any DNA that makes him who he is. Saving him might make him a completely different person. Sad really
TaintGrundleGooch
Damn it was that strong/uncontrollable? Not even a suit could contain it?
Kitbash
All his power does is kill, containing it would mean having a means to safely release it (think cyclops visor). Not a nice way to live
UnifiedHivemind
Would you really want to live knowing you'd killed over 250 people and could accidentally kill more if you made one mistake?
ShouldersDeepInAHorse
Depends, are the 250 people French?...
TaintGrundleGooch
Tho sometimes that has to be done, I don't think the X-Men always go into battle planning to kill people
TaintGrundleGooch
But I acknowledge that it's most likely better this way. I mean his power would just be killing the enemy anyway
skincancerisfun
Is that a trick question?
besttopkek
if it involved people like you
TaintGrundleGooch
True that would tough. I would like to think maybe they could have given him the option to try to atone and hone his powers
Loutrezilla
Atone for what ? Being born ?
TaintGrundleGooch
Essentially
cable7193
The kid? No. Don't think so
rangermcfadden
What about Hazmat? They got her a suit and she was a Young Avenger, similar terrible powers
johnzaku
That's not DARK enough!
DankWilliamsSr
I think it's more about the political ramifications if it ever got out that it was a mutant that killed all those people.
Armored0Titan0
One rip and everything around him without a healing factor dies almost instantly.
JonnyTHM
Point is that if anyone ever finds out that mutants can just be bombs, there'd be a genocide of them.
Loutrezilla
Worse than bombs in this case, but yeah.
IWishPeopleWouldStopStealingMyUsernames
XuncuTheTiger
Said the bitch who married the goddamned king of Dry Black Atlantis to girl who can't even take advantage of White Privilege.
j0hnan0n
Shut up. We're perf.
momemes
pffff
SilkyZ
Kid was going to live a shit life if he was cured, if he kept living.
MattDude
Johnny five dicks lol
SuperSaiyanSasquatch
Anus Georg
dfsmitty0711
I laugh at that every fucking time.
cheeseguy3412
At least he can walk. Timmy 605 dicks can't leave the house.
grootybooty
What about the guy with a billions of assholes?
cheeseguy3412
For the love of god, keep sugar free gummy bears away from that man.
JohnnyFiveDicks
Yes?
afriendinneedsafriendindeedafriendwithmemesisbetter
Where's chainsaw hands Joe?
Undrave
He can't type, he has no fingers!
TheFrozenNorwegian
Soo... Do they all work?
Dinnerbird
We need answers!
liltortatree
He can probably get 4 up at a time, all 5 would make him faint from blood loss in the brain.
WibblyWobblyTimeyWimeyWeightedCompanionCubeFromValinor
Depends which size they are.
athaclena
I hope you sit on that name forever.
occamsblazer
That was a solid quintuple entendre
Angryzeus1
Damn I really wasn't expecting that
gastonlikegaston
I wanted to make that joke so bad. "there's nothing to cure" - says the girl who makes rain clouds to the girl who kills people by touching
kibateo
to be fair storm can destroy probably the country just by being upset so yeah in that case it's more about control of their power
mateuszmatijot
I got a better alternative. "There's nothing to cure" - says the girl who makes rain clouds to the guy that kills everything in vicinity.
Gdeadman
Honestly death touch girl has it better than this guy, like she doesn't decat/burn all living things near her
CassanovaFrankenstain
Cutlazz
The champion we need.
gzneto
I laughed so hard it triggered my asthma, I almost thew up. Worth it.
eazolan
Asthma is your mutant power. (cracks knuckles) We don't tolerate mutants around here.
Imadethisaccounttopost
Problem is, storm has to always be in control and calm or else her powers take over and destroy the ecosystem.
aphallatosis
Kills. Everything. She. Touches.
Imadethisaccounttopost
She learns to control it in the comics including turning it off and power recall.
GreatTombOfNazarick
Johnny Five Dicks! I laughed so hard, thank you for that.
Undrave
It sounds fine until you realize you can't cram that many orifices that close together :p
0956
DVDA or TVDA?
Lilly64
That scene really should have ended with Rogue taking off her glove and telling Storm to shake her hand
DigitalMau
Dude i would pay to see that
causality
I found it to be brilliant if unintentional satire of the defensiveness of some disabled communities.
sonikkuruzu
The people who whine about autism cures are either high functioning and like it or are Tumblr self-diagnosers.
embermark
Aspergers here. The problem isn't people wanting a cure, it's the assumption that *everyone* needs a cure.
FrozenCoast
People saying cochlear implants are “deaf genocide”. https://www.google.ca/amp/amp.timeinc.net/time/76154/deaf-culture-cochlear-implants
OldmanSerious
I had one (fully able, not deaf at all) woman on a forum tell me that cochlear implants on infants violated their bodily autonomy.
OldmanSerious
She did have some of a point: cochlear implants are not 100% safe and putting them in an infant often needs more ops later in life.
OddOod
Found the canadian
FrozenCoast
You’re not wrong, but how?
meskarune
I would love to be cured and I fucking hate it when some person with mild disabilities tries to speak for all the disabled and say that shit
causality
Or deaf parents turning down cochlear implants for their kids even when they're paid for.
meskarune
There is a reason: https://www.fda.gov/MedicalDevices/ProductsandMedicalProcedures/ImplantsandProsthetics/CochlearImplants/ucm062843.htm
causality
What's your disability, if I may ask?
Meilkor
Kinda think that's none of your business - no offense
meskarune
Why do you want to know?