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Someone want to explain it?
Aug 5, 2020 8:08 AM
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BreakfastIsTheMostImportantMeal
Wait what, reptiles do it like us?
tanneberger2
Dumbass. Have you heard of in vitro fertilising? Huh? I bet you're feeling dumb now
endtransmission365
https://www.cnet.com/news/christian-group-to-schools-stop-filling-kids-heads-with-dinosaurs/
QuiteHugeMegaPlusUltra
wobblecopterrrr
To be fair, we really have no idea, they could have bit it off and sat on it...
Turbolibros
They lived for dozens of millions of years, so I think is safe to assume they had some kind of Dino-Sutra.
bigblindguy
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KHJbSvidohg
ReverseTrapTsukasa
Relevant Star Trek quote: Is it possible
v
anyway188136
"Life uh finds a way."
copperdomebodhi
"How could iguanas possibly mate? The couldn't because they didn't exist." /s
doesntmatter
You make a good point. I've never seen an iguana any way.
Skevoid
Were they TRYING to give a textbook example of an argument from ignorance?
Forgotmyoldaccountbutohwell
Being unable to understand something doesn't mean you're right.
Understopper
Some of them might have got a stegosaurus
lRogueShadow
*Mega’saurus
mrcpu
Morbidly obese people don’t exist either.
Mediumtim2
/r/immobile , if you're brave enough
TheWalkinDude19
Life finds a way.
YesImThatMrTrebus
Christians against dinosaurs
Imalwaysready
It was all planted there to test your faith, man!
jasoncolby
Alcohol must have been involved
TeacupCannibal
Do they also think alligators and birds don't exist....?
TheEmperorOfMankind40000
Well they laid eggs, so maybe they have the same peen flaps as some snakes, or they just jizzed on the eggs like fish?
sciencebasedlifeform
Sure but when I do it at the supermarket.....
ProfessorChaos
You fuckin animal. Lol.
vwgasyoudead
FactsAccordingtoImgur
This needs more updoots
uhuhuuhuuuuAahAaaaaahAAAAAAAh
if this ain't top comment soon..
shoeonheadanditsyou
ffs is this real?..
smashpro1
Never underestimate stupid people.
Illithidbane
Pastor says Earth is 6000 years old. Pastor speaks for God, thus can't be wrong. But 6000 is not old enough for dinos. Therefore, no dinos.
donorkort
Think otherwise and you're a devilspawn! Force this belief for generations and bam - you have a religion.
basicwhitelich
ILovePolarBears
He is clearly trying his best
len0k
JimJonPingPongDongDangMong
Waaait a minute... She has no hair!?
MadJackMcJack
Bloody unreasonable women!
QuiteHugeMegaPlusUltra
Only feathers
aPokal
Owlbisidian
len0k
PuruseeTheShakingCat
That’s... disturbing.
DargonBall
Ha ha how sill.... WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!?
causality
Oh thank god it's the version without sound.
UmegaDarkstar
Is that a fucking turtle dick!??
WookieWookieWookie
No, because it's on top of a ball, not another turtle.
learntotakejoke
How do Crocs and alligators mate? They're as old as dinosaurs....
DingusMajoris
And birds ARE dinosaurs, and they seem to have no trouble mating...though I think it involves bees at some point. I need to talk to my dad.
HedonistBeard
Well, the alligators do it later, the crocodiles in a while.
stimcity
Nice
Epinephilim
Violently, I imagine.
Crimsonak
This is a really common misconception. Everything alive today, is as old as everything else the evolutionary sense.
snipekill1997
Older actually so long as you are somewhat loose with the definition https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crocodylomorpha
[deleted]
[deleted]
Kajitheninja
thats just wrong. plenty of species can cross breed. a Mule is a cross breed, as is a Liger, a yattle, tigon, yakalo
ponkoponko
I found the Karen
KellyanneAlternativeFacts
Goddamnit... Not with EACH OTHER. (How do crocs mate? And also how do alligators mate?) PiCk Up A bOoK jAcKaSs
Epinephilim
How could dinosaurs possibly mate? Go ask furaffinity.
KaiaPaws
I'll report back in an hour!
Epinephilim
Have fun!
ScipioWright
It's been an hour, where's your report?
KaiaPaws
Sorry, it took longer than expected. It turns out... it turns out dinosaurs can mate in a lot of different ways. A lot, a lot.
AuralOcean
We've lost them. Lower the flags.
KaiaPaws
Apologies; had to take a nap once I finished researching.
boom1chaching
That doesn't count. Real life dinos didnt have huge fucken anime tiddies...unfortunately.
Epinephilim
SOFT TISSUE DOESN'T FOSSILIZE. HOW WOULD YOU KNOW?
boom1chaching
There's still hope
CaptainRajah
Her parents managed it, so anything's possible I guess.
digdoodler
MrKomisiripala
Her parents managed SOMETHING. But you can put a skin suit on a raccoon too
WhatTheFucksALommy
THAT’S A LOT OF DAMAGE
Pillmatic540540
Well it's a lot easier when you're siblings. I mean your rooms are right next to each other...only drawback is your incest kid is retarded.
Mytrashpanda101
Nature finds a way
physcistwithbiceps
I'm sorry but I down voted you for botching that line
MrKomisiripala
And sometimes nature spits out someone like her and says, “because I can mf’ers”
Brunoemf90
Nature, uh........ finds a way. FTFY
physcistwithbiceps
Thank you! That's how it's done
manonthemountain
Craicerjack
goudist
Porcupines figured out banging I'm sure a stegosaurus did too.
binaryspike
Porcupines aren't real mate, they are little liberals and PETA in a costume trying to find out who mistreats their animals. Hypocrites.
RayzorHero
Was Gona Google cu of rule 64 but your comment reminded me of intellectual thinking. Ty
Daxidol
You say that, but considering all the different dinosaurs that apparently existed, there's not a single sex tape. Checkmate Atheists.
Sauroctonus
Couldn't they just kinda... Twist the tail?
agermanguy
Even Alexa did
fruitybootyhole
And turtles
goflyblind
*stego-sore-ass
TheEvenPrez
They found a way to pork?
T23FSU
Megasoreass
XIXIXimena
Stag-osaurus. As with any animal, I'm sure some were queer.
Somegone
Googled it... aperantly its face down, bite the dirt and rear upp " the more you know"
Zephirod
ever seen a Tapir Dong? Doesen't matter where it needs to go, it will go there.
ConformistWithACause
They lay their tail against their own back so the under part of the tail without barbs acts like a pillow between the two
Quarantinous
Everyone knows that a T-Rex's penis is actually at the end of its tail, meaning that the female was always on top /s
attofreak
Americans figured out banging, I'm sure Argentinosaurus did too.
[deleted]
[deleted]
BaileyAmBull
Youuuuu.......
Doomgriever
IHateCakeDays
And yet I can’t find a way to bang with my ugly face.
GravityOtter
Megalodon must’ve been quite a show.
goudist
Probably similar to great white sharks but scaled up.
Lots43
Ooooh, a hedgehog can never be...
elinveronicap
If I had more than one upvote, I would give it to you.
MrsF1nch
..buggered at all
TheGodEmperorOfChaos
Well for starters there are 4 different types of animals on the chart, some known to lay eggs others not. It's a half assed question.
Winter23
What does that have to do with mating? Unless they do it salmon style they still gotta do the deed.
melindajo123
Well, it is hard to under different types of mating when all they know is missionary.
TheGodEmperorOfChaos
FlamesFlashFantastic
BlueDuckPale
Procupines breed through hatred, not intercourse like every other mammal
TheCrassAndTheFurious
HAHA!
Askarus
I think I'm married to a porcupine
Fizzlebuz
I got to feed some two weeks ago and let me tell you they behave like giant guinea pigs
battery1979
Have you ever seen a porcupine in real life, those dudes are so chill, I don't think the could hate anything.
mentallychallengeaccepted
Is that true for purcopines?
goudist
I think it's Canada Geese that breed through hatred.
batukhan
Well ducks do rape. Lots of animals actually
GoneOh
You sure it isn't dragonflies?
SirRichardOfHead
*Canada gooses
FondofM
You got a problem with Canada gooses then you got a problem with me and you better let that one marinate
SirRichardOfHead
admeaz0123
DrDadJokes
Canada Geese: I'm sorry mate but IM GOING TO SKULL FUCKING YOU. Again nothing personnal sorry.
ScarecrowSticks
Soory*
IThinkYouGotAFineBrainJack
No no, they are fueled by hatred, like blood in humans. but they breed through fear.
deepthought64
"Christians against dinosaurs"?? Really??
saganworshipper
For decades now. "Fossils exist to test your faith".
ImmaCatImmaSexyCat
Never underestimate the power of stupid people in groups.
RufusPimperton
I've met these people. Weird folk to be sure. It's a rationalization/defense of young earth creationism.
LateNightBunnyParty
I knew a woman who believed this weird anti-dinosaur nonsense.
ilsalta
always-has-been.gif
legnouaa
My exact reaction ...
TheWombatStrikesAgain
Start your own group. Call it "Dinosaurs against Christians". Get more members. Laugh at their humiliation.
VarlenSantongkum
Would be perfect indie rock band name.
imgurianitarian
Instead of sharing their messages of how God can help you through life, they have nothing better to do than attack history.
420username69
suddentwitch
my money is on the dinos, pretty sure this fight wont last long
zapbranagan
Yeah, religion can help people rationalize anything.
Endocrom
And yet others believe man and dinosaur coexisted because of creationism.
Woestkonijn
There is a Facebook that is dinosaurs against Christians who are against dinosaurs. Dacwaad. Funny stuff
kevlarburrito
At this point Christians are against just about everything, up to and including other Christians who aren't Christian enough.
Rimeswithorange
I mean, Flat Earthers are a thing, so....
upsidedownjackrussell
I thought that was an internet joke for a really long time. I'm so disappointed in humanity that it isn't.
SilentScreamsX
Well the existence of dinosaurs kind of disproves the entire Bible, so they have to clutch at straws.
StayChel
I figure it's because they are millions of years when the world is like 16000 for some reason despite the bible never saying that
Back2lurkingMaypopoutagain
Yeah it's a real thing, just like evangelicals believing the earth is 6000 years old. Also there is another camp that believes Noah had
Back2lurkingMaypopoutagain
Dinosaurs on the ark..
PlankTableGo
Might be fake, but this is real: https://www.conservapedia.com/Main_Page
tyroneslothrop01
It's an age-old argument, sadly ?
CailetRille
My mom is one. It's nuts. She bounces back and forth thinking either satan made the bones to make people believe in science & leave god, 1/
CailetRille
Or scientists have fabricated them somehow. Do I need to mention she's anti mask? Thank goodness I was vaccinated before she went bonkers
hinahan
Does she also happen to be a Trump supporter? My mom’s crazy too so I feel you.
CailetRille
Die hard trump supporter :(
hinahan
Coincidence??
PiGuy314
Even Ken Ham doesn't deny their existence, and says they died after getting off Noah's Ark. https://answersingenesis.org/dinosaurs/
PiGuy314
Ham is a somewhat extreme proponent of Biblical literality, accepted by mostly Evangelical denominations.
Iatesomecoffeecups
Why couldnt God make big lizards? No reason to beleive that.
rileyb402
My former sister-in-law doesn't believe in dinosaurs, but did commit adultery, so go figure that one out
alecdshope
Fake Christians are great at picking what parts of the Bible they want to believe.
frostman233
Fanatics
NOYLL
As a devout Christian, I'm embarrassed by some of my fellow believers making us look like idiots.
Aliubi
It's a troll, I'm sure...but being sure doesn't make me right.
TheZacAttack
Do your best to remember you're not the only one. Faith and reason are not as incompatible as the idiots would make it seem to be
laton
I had to look this shit up to see if it was actually real. WT living F??
decorativemooseknuckle
Let them have it, its better they spend their efforts on a stupid argument than crusading against masks or planned parenthood
TheRobbieB
You say that now, but in 5 years we’re gonna have senators tweeting this shit.
alecdshope
I was sure this was satire but it appears not to be. https://www.christiansagainstdinosaurs.com/
flamingflamingo
I refuse to believe that is anything but a troll group that has accidentally attracted morons.
RenaissanceFaireMan
All the fossils and bones found are all fake?
Dpunch4
Big Dino has you all fooled but not me! Jurasking me to believe that these stupid pointy birds are real? Fuck you and your "moon".
RaqNasty
They were planted there to make Trump look bad
parsonf
They start from a conclusion and work backwards. Anything seemingly contradictory must somehow be wrong.
XanderCorsaj
God put them there to test our faith...
disboii
lmao. That tricky son of a bitch.
Back2lurkingMaypopoutagain
A lot of evangelicals will tell you they were put there to test man's faith..
redmangc
The devil put them there to dissuade man from gods word, cultist scare me
secretdpp
I've had several Ethels (Karen's once they're 60+) insist fossils and science are merely to test the faith of the righteous against doubt
ProjectKurtz
Young earth creationists believe fossils were planted by Satan to cause people to lose faith. I'm not kidding.
ThePiedPiperofRuination
As a kid, I went to a church that taught kids that dinosaurs were real but died out in Noah's Flood. Thankfully, I already knew that was BS.
Doomgriever
I have met these people in person, they think dinosaur bones were buried by god for "manking to have something to ponder on"
rbudrick
Fossils, I've heard these idiots say, were placed there by the devil.
Goldenbeer
Or that they were planted by Satan to deceive you is another thing I've heard then say.
Doomgriever
Literally anything other than, you know, the logical explanation of evolution..
Sauroctonus
Don't argue with creationists, just make sure they don't alter the curriculum.
MehEdits
I've heard the flip side "The devil put them there to confuse us"
Slappybags69
Even when their book says their sky daddy doesn't do that. It's always comical to be able to quote their own bullshit back at them.
MyNameIsntChris
I think they want to believe that humans were the first living creatures on earth. It's one thing to be religious, and another to deny facts
Itsonporpoise
Is it though?
MyNameIsntChris
Being religious? I don't mind it, if it's what it takes to make some people be kind to each other then yea.
Itsonporpoise
If someone believes in a specific chair and it makes them a better person and they’re happy with themselves and they don’t try to push 1/2
Stensticles
This is my family. They deny all evidence of fossils and evolution entirely, and shoot down any and all “facts” I present.
MyNameIsntChris
It's your family and it's your right to do what you want. I personally would have given up and moved on
uzerok
I think the Creationist idea is that humans and animals were created on the same "day". Though animals came technically before humans.
MyNameIsntChris
Oh right, cause in the garden there was a snake as well. Then I have no idea why they don't like dinos
uzerok
It's not a coherent group. See Ken Ham's (debated Bill Nye on evolution on TV) Creation Museum: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xVHWq0ZGE_Y
MrWobblyHead
That's religious idiocy for you.
bingbangbong3
Not arguing for a young earth, but to be fair dating dinosaur bones is a bit of guess work. Carbon-14 dating isn’t effective for that age->
bingbangbong3
And how reasonable is it to assume that all uranium half-life dating began with brand new uranium. ->
bingbangbong3
https://science.howstuffworks.com/environmental/earth/geology/dinosaur-bone-age.htm
bingbangbong3
I’m not saying young earthers are right, but it might not be fair to assume they are all idiots.
MrWobblyHead
Past a certain age carbon 14 is practically useless but other radioactive materials and isotopes can be used that have far longer half lives
MofongoBalls
Former coworker genuinely believes the earth is roughly 6k years old and the dinos are faked
prfesser
Wikipedia says that over a third of Americans believe that the Earth and inhabitants were created as-is, less than 10K years ago. Sigh...
VultureTX
How would you know if you took the blue pill? SimEarth till we don't destroy ourselves ;(
atheistzombie
ImmaCatImmaSexyCat
America is the Florida of Earth.
atheistzombie
So...about the same number of people who think Trump is a decent human being and doing a good job?
RecurringNightmare
not the same number, the same people!
Rimeswithorange
As a Christian I never understood where that whole age of the earth thing comes from. I’m no bible scholar, but there’s nothing I’ve seen
Rimeswithorange
That indicates time. In my opinion, the number of days God used to create the world is subjective. I like to think that each day could have
Rimeswithorange
Been millions of years. Also - the animals were created before man, so it’s also feasible they died off before humans created
Xavkha
Its the addition of the lifespans of the family tree of adam and eve, so seth +...+methuselah+...+noah+shem+...+abraham untill jesus = 6k
MofongoBalls
My mom grew up Jehovas witness (she abandoned that as soon as she was an adult) They believe dinosaurs probably lived with humans
sturmhauke
Some medieval dudes estimated it based on genealogies listed in various books of the Bible.
Rimeswithorange
Yeah, but also according to the Bible, early humans lived hundreds of years. I’m sure those guys were basing it off the medieval lifespan
Rimeswithorange
So basically by the end of the book of Numbers, literal thousands of years had passed already
17arkOracle
It's possible it's a troll group. Quite a few exist (I know there's a Christians Against Masturbation one people unironically post from).
Maaatth
Looks like a parody group, indeed. But when you mix USA's integrism and Poe's law, you never know.
LoudBirb
Considering that around 40% of Americans are young earth creationists, it probably isn't. Source:
flamingflamingo
No one's debating creationists exist, but groups like "creationists against dinosaurs" seem a little too specialized to be legitimate.
LoudBirb
https://news.gallup.com/poll/261680/americans-believe-creationism.aspx
momohkabbah
They're real. I followed them on Facebook for a while to see if they were really serious and then got banned for posting a satirical video.
GarmBlack
On the triceratops and sauropod... elephants, rhinos, and hippos manage. For the T-rex, think about how a peacock or condor mates.
foundthelandscaper
Imma go ahead and take your word on that one
spacecowboyein
Or, they all just had gigantic fucking dino dongers
yzark
Did dinosaurs have cloacas? If so they may have mated by standing on too of each other.
pretendthisisaclevername
I'll refer to Captain America..."no I don't think I will"
romeojoleo
I can see how T. rex an triceratops could bang but the stegosaurus and brontosaurus ya that’s weird
Tinoki
Elephants, rhinos, and hippos don’t have thick giant tales, though. The best comparison is to look at modern-day reptiles, primarily crocs.
StonesOnTheHill
Elephants don't have a huge meaty tail tho. They must have done it some other way.
mattbl
First time I saw elephants mating on a nature show, I thought the male elephant had a 5th leg.
wyatt8740
they do, their trunks
mattbl
So a 6th leg?
StonesOnTheHill
"Behold! An insect!" -Diogenes, probably.
MatthewJohnsona
The secret ingredient is a giant dong.
RustyDoorNail
Or a big puss
LumpWithaLeafHat
They don't have huge tails on the way. Do we have a other example for them?
Proxymanity
Alligators & Crocodiles?
LumpWithaLeafHat
Thought about that. They mate in water, from the side. I don't think that would work.
VipertheFirst
Well... there was water way back when. Why not?
LumpWithaLeafHat
It's definitely possible, I'm no expert. But if I were that big, I think it would be hard to get up and now. I looked it up, though, and 1
CARSONPONY
Mating in water is fun
ConfederacyOfDunces
Didn't triceratops lay eggs? Wouldn't birds be a better model
NovocainHurricane
I often do think about such things.
Aprilmadness
I think of little else.
Xaldyn
You already lost them when you said "think about".
ARabidDingo
Given that a turkey mates by essentially leaping over the female and slam-dunking her with semen I choose to imagine that instead
KingOfTheAnarchists
Come on and slam, welcome to the jam!
KingOfTheAnarchists
Also, turkey semen should be called gobble-D-gook
IlCastradore
Well I have no idea.
IAmTheKingOfCheese
I've got a video of some ostrich sex from a visit to the zoo. Very niche fetish!
SpecialProjectY
Condors: https://youtu.be/orqpvv450pI
PicklesMcGeee
The framing of this video does not help, it looks like a video some one would take walking past an open window of people banging
SpecialProjectY
So, Zoo.. basically...
shadowbane1120
She bend it ALLL the way over.
HeadJamistan
Face REALLY down, ass REALLY up.
BigOrkWaaagh
That's the way we like to REALLY fuck!
SpecialProjectY
Peacocks: https://youtu.be/xzlnjedrJ60
Vockstar
This better not awaken anything in me...
Killacayne
WOW!! What's his secret for lasting so long? I'm usually done before my pants are off
PowerToAllThePeople
Thats the trick, he isnt wearing pants.
elreeneey
Did I just watch birds mating? Yes. This was not how I expected my Thursday to start but here we are.
KellyanneAlternativeFacts
Wednesday?
elreeneey
....You are right. It's is Wednesday. Pro tip: don't comment before coffee. Alternative Fact: I'm from the future.
sniffo
In all fairness, humans wouldn't be able to breed either if we thought sex involved standing on ones partner's back.
Eyesotope
Says you.
IDoPictureStuff
Not with that attitude.
PelicansTh1nk
You’re doing it wrong ....
IntergalacticNoodles
https://www.thehappychickencoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/Chickens-Mating.png
sniffo
A fair point! Maybe Diplodocuses have more in common with modern day birds, than they do with reptiles :)
PERRYthePlatpus
It doesn’t?
HommeDeFeu
+1
dekket
Fuck. I've been doing it wrong all these years. Wait, why do I have three kids?.....
dogedogegiraffedoge
The mailman may have stood on your wife
goboltz
Naw, that costs extra . .
theheebs25
wait, have I been doing the sex wrong?
krapmyself
Sounds like a trick shot challenge.
sniffo
do you accept?
Blacktusk
Well I'm not going to stop doing it just because you made me feel silly.
sniffo
That's the spirit! Don't let _anyone_ tell you what to do! You don't need to follow anybody! You've got to work it out for yourself!
squidman1297
In fairness, we're one of only two primate species that copulate face-to-face
ourari
The other being... bonobos? I know I can look it up, but it's fun to guess.
theheebs25
not always
Radix865
We're the only habitual bipedal primate which might explain it for humans. And as for bonobos, they actually have a posture closer to ->
Radix865
-> humans than chimpanzees when walking upright.
Rignak
That's a lie. I've never even seen your mom's face!
MiguelConQueso
Ha! Suck it Trebek
OperationM1ndcrime
Below
OperationM1ndcrime
Below
drakewarnock
Humans can't exist!
KaiaPaws
checkmate atheists
Ekibwurm
in all fairness, if intelligence was taken into account some...many...most.. humans wouldn't be able to breed...
timotomat0
Fun stick go in peepee hole.
ilhares
Well, I've clearly been doing it wrong - but I've had a lot of fun and no children as a result.
JBGz1
Roki344
Ouch, that would hurt.
Stilyx123
Just seeing it in video hurts a lot. Source : dude trust me