piconuke
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Aug 5, 2023 1:27 AM
piconuke
76839
1535
19
poochyena
Has this woman never heard of horses or cows? Or does she think those animals can speak?
netflixandwine
So basically The Congo by Michael Creighton (but with orangutans instead of gorillas)
heywoodjabme
If they can do it to me they can do it to you orangutan !
khopesh87
Wonder if this is like how we have myths about not giving Fairy Folk your name, or agreeing to any deals. Same for the orangutans, only its 'don't let the hairless apes hear you talk!'
duchessofawesome
Ook.
ratfinkfuck
Food for thought: multiple humans have at one point or another for sure tried to make orangutans work.
agburanar
I mean... she's not wrong.
EroticZombiePants
If they could speak, we would have wiped them out millennia ago.
zeacorzeppelin10
Orangutans study us from behind zoo glass and from the jungle, they know our wants and they know our needs, they see how we take anything of value and trying to make as much money off of it as possible and make sure all the ones who put the product before the consumer were paid the absolute minimum to increase profit, we're rapidly poisoning our own air and water for profit and yet we are the advance race.
CplCarrot
Ook!
Willowknowsall
Well I'm the king of the swingers club the monkey vip, I've reached the top and had to stop and that's what's a bothering me
PlatypusPowersActivate
My favorite one of these is that rocks are sentient, and actually very squishy. Then tense up when they are about to be touched or moved.
Jaqdakloun
My dear Nigel, just because you choose to ignore recent socioeconomic changes, that doesn't mean (human approaches) uh, um, oooooh oooooh eeeeh eeeeh
yeah222
Rick and Morty did something like this with squirrels
whatsisname
As though spending every day hunting and rooting around for food isn't a struggle all it's own. Sure is a lot of romanticizing the wilderness. For most wild animals, survival is a daily, brutal struggle.
Wraid
same thing with gorillas
GuyleDoucheFieldReporter
aShogunNamedMarcus
There's really no way of knowing if you are talking to an orangutan call center
variiation
An orangutan would probably be able to sort out your issue.
willpostanything
orang=people hutan=forest so people of the forest
Recycledflowers
I think companies would have enslaved them if they could talk, long ago. It seems human beings have become like a parasite all take and no benefit to our host, sometimes even parasitic on each other we don’t regulate ourselves. The laws that began that way, have become circumvented and unsupported by huge consortiums for minimising over heads. Our over heads deemed more important than even community water, shelter, food, safety, though leaders are too self interested we can readdress the balance
Fishkeeper
The thing is, we really can do better. If you look at history, there are plenty of examples of humanity being a good thing for the ecosystem. Sorta like if beavers and seasonal fires could consciously think about their actions and do their thing when and where it's best needed. We're not an inherently destructive species. Though we sure are acting like it.
Vergenbuurg
arumunus
If they actually could speak- it'd be real fascinating to see just how that mentally fucks with people who believe that humans are divinely set above all other animals. (Would also probably be really sad, considering we as a species can't even get over shit like racism. Imagine adding a whole new species.)
Lulabel73
FlatPlutoSociety
shinoharaliz
Favorite Larson of all time. Thank you
DrShrinker
that was my 1st thought . +1
Exdeath5000
Your Uber has arrived
Vergenbuurg
(has audio)
v
Arbitrarynamehere
Holy shit that's awesome
tomatoboy
Considering all three species are now critically endangered, if they could speak, they probably would have pleaded with us to stop harming them by now.
cavymeister
MentalFest
I don’t think they have the ability to organize across the globe…
MentalFest
Hence why animal rights activism and an open and accessible internet are very useful to fighting corporate environmental destruction.
TheColorsOfRain
…Unless they communally felt that the protection of the remaining few of them wasnt worth the incredible likelihood of their enslavement
RalphH
we would kill them off even faster :(
Recycledflowers
Have you seen the orangutan that tried to attack a logging machine? Took a stick to it to defend its home. Heart breaking.
takingupspace
Jesus Christ.
ironymus
Yeah, this came also to my mind
themobileappisbroken
I think they'd prefer death over enslavement.
Sipmonsnsn
Why?
belly42
But just think about all the useful skills they could learn! /s
HedonistBeard
It would only take one to want to survive enough to start talking, and "death over enslavement" is a choice not often made by the unenslaved
Daevram1123
Oook?
wiltsjunk
Came here to say that lol
piconuke
why is there a monkey in this library ?
FractalChainsaw
One of my favorite snippets from Guards Guards. "Just don't say monkey ohshit."
SophieClockwise
But sometimes, on very rare occasions, they choose to work in a library.
theDogter
I also knew one back in the day that ran a bar.
Fn0rd
GNU STP
blumpk1npie
And go to anime conventions
TheGrubinator
Why would they let a monkey into a library?
stevencloser
Because he's doing a good job and gets paid in bananas.
GingerLaird
The Librarian is a faculty member, and was once human wizard named Dr. Horace Worblehat. A strong wave of magic, altering reality, transformed the Librarian into an orang-utan, Pongo pongo, native of Bhangbhangduc and nearby islands; at that time, his colleagues still remembered how he looked as a human.
agburanar
And after a few days of being an orangutan, The Librarian went to great lengths to destroy all recrords of his previous name (as he knew that would be required to return him to his true form, and he decided he enjoyed the prehensile toes, and the ability to fold a human in half)
blackmetalcoyote
Ook.
JCBalance
Alfadorfox
GNU
TheReturnOfGreasemunky129
OOK!!!
Rovylern
With milk?
dcl88
Eeeek!
piconuke
a monkey, in a library ?
ruint
https://discworld.fandom.com/wiki/The_Librarian
SophieClockwise
*muffled sounds of orangutan violence*
blackmetalcoyote
Oh no....