yourmumiswatchingthinkbeforeyoupost
212663
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Jan 30, 2018 5:57 AM
yourmumiswatchingthinkbeforeyoupost
212663
5747
299
maddenedmage
Remember you only have one family, and what you were also an ass for what you did.
TheGriffin
Put it in your own closet and then let your parents find it. Enjoy awkward dinners
wildfrontierking
This depends too much on other things happening. I just don't find it feasible enough to be worth being called evil. True evil is foolproof.
TangyAlmondJoy
The word "dildo" is funny. Just say it a couple of times. Haha, how stupid. No wonder this guy crammed it up his own ass.
Dudewhosaysrad
I don’t feel like it was anyone’s fault she has a dildo
PotatoFaminePart2
who uses randomly discovered dildos? more likely mum will find it, scream, and then whoop your ass with it
BatmanDeadpoolSlenderMan
STI's!!!
Copperbrat
If my brother touched my dildo for any reason whatsoever, I'd put a lock on my property and start thinking of moving out. Creepy as fuck.
RYNO1221
H3llbab3
Parents getting along a little too well? With this one simple trick, you can look forward to a lengthy custody battle and two Christmases!
NineColonels100
Just creepy, nothing more.
ScienceGoneTooFar
Exileddude
Back when wife was younger and still living at home, her mom confiscated her vibrator. We found it in her mom's sock drawer................
Shewy92
So no one is going to mention that he touched his sisters dildo?
Rapiecage
I mean, it prolly doesn't go ALL the way in
ZoeyDate
Oh god. What if daughter has an STD and it's unwashed when mom uses it?
Bassi1990
I mean, you kinda see if it's washed.
thatwoodguy
I just posted photocopies of my sister diary in various bathroom stalls at school
disposiablewhitemail
How old is the sister?
PaulLynde
Why doesn't he just use it?
Hreinyday
Why do you assume that the parents dont talk?
reallyAhuman
alticaarden
What if the parents are prudes, dont use it and freak out on sight and start questioning the kids, embarrassing the sister.
PhoenixQueenAzula
So uh...how does sister find out mom has her dildo exactly?
InRetrospectIShouldveLearnedToSwimBeforeBecomingaSailor
Evilwall
Worst case the sister and mom bond over toy use, and you're disgusted because they start sharing
ZeRootOfAllEvil
Worst case surely would be Dad also using it?
aznanimality
Disgusted isn't the word you're looking for here.
Thedangernoodle27
isn't that a dream tho?
ihateimgurffs
ASS TO ASS
FuzzyX
That is why double ended dildos exist my friend.
SendMeTheTittiestOfPics
Sharing the dad? Whoa
Lamplord
MyCommentsAreUsuallyShit
Put googley eyes on it and a smiley face and put it back where it was. She would be confused as to why, and wondering who did it.
AStupidWeeb
If she only has one sibling, it will be pretty obvious that he did it.
BadgerSims
This is the lamest and unfunny things I have seen on here for a long time.
HermanManly
tbh this has been imgur for the last like 6 months at least... i dont even know why I come back here. It's on the same level as 9gag
Brainchow
How would sister find out mom is using it? I’m seriously asking not being a dick
LolaSupershot
You monster!!
Bassi1990
Sounds like someone has had her dildo stolen.
LolaSupershot
It's traumatizing, yes, yes it is.
Bassi1990
I can't imaging, I never had my dildo stolen.
LolaSupershot
Count your blessings you dear lucky son of a gun
LolaSupershot
*girl of a pearl? I dunno either way bless ya!
steve77777777
seeing 9gag on here is really weird because I left it for imgur
Shujaa95
You'll get used to it. I see about two per day.
PhillipJFrey
Welcome
CanYouPlayWonderwall
Same, I left because of the toxicity in the comment sections
lysomaru
I prefer imgur than 9gag doesn't mean i have anything to them.. just it was my first meme experience.. so it kinda had a place in me.
radiocaf
I also left it for Imgur. Never looked back.
derock789
What about memeful.com or wherever the original pic was ripped from. I'd atleast consider 9gag a step up from that.
steve77777777
memefuo is where you make memes lol.
DankMcGibbons
I think it's a template site.
Fefeaage
That’s like leaving depression for autism.
mambypambyland
I would say it’s the other way around.
Fefeaage
Maybe
steve77777777
it's like bumping into an ex
ProfessorMelonHead
Who's style your new partner tries to replicate every single day
PepsiIsBetterThanCocaCola
*Whose
Dedeurmetdebaard
A retarded ugly ex.
Jumbocactuar
A retarded, ugly cousin on the front page, anyhow
IWasDoingJustFineLurking
Friend wants to know what 9gag is....
noreference
“What’s a computer”
IWasDoingJustFineLurking
Well I got that reference.
TechnicalTim
No he does not, trust me.
AxellTheDragon
Imgur without mods, comments are censored for everyone except OP instead of being flagged, more frequent reposts, bad community, etc.
Lill9
It’s a website that used to be funny and have memes
Gmayor61
God I wish this were me
mambypambyland
I have a feeling a lot of people did the same. The quality of Imgur has decreased accordingly. Not because of you but just in general
BustedHelmet
the moderators don't seem to be helping much either
mambypambyland
I don’t want nice positive pansy posts. It’s how you can tell imgur is getting younger. 9gag went to college and learned about safe spaces
steve77777777
which is why I left. after nsfw was bannable and that one gif was banned I just couldn't anymore. the pc normies had taken over.
mambypambyland
Imgur used to be a lot edgier and smarter
BustedHelmet
exactly my point used to be closer to 4chan minus the over the top cringe and not safe for life posts mixed in everywhere
mambypambyland
Used to be: 9gag for gross teenagers. 4chan for weird teenagers. Tumblr for mild humor. Imgur for smart adults. Now the bar is lower.
youresorttorepostingcomments
Again, imgur has never been close to 4chan or Reddit this place is a image hosting site and nothing else
youresorttorepostingcomments
Lol no it wasn’t, stop
mambypambyland
5 years ago when you were in middle school probably kiddo let the adults talk here’s a butterscotch candy and stay off my lawn
noon3r
How about a couple drops of hot sauce and return it?
Gianttesticlemonster
Don't tempt me with a good time!
3PON
Or Icy Hot
Syralight
And then get hot sauce in your eyes while you sleep? You should be careful not to antagonize people who know where you live.
raknor88
Calm down Satan, that's just cruel and inhumane. I like it.
Fjjdkdc
what about itching powder?
ilsalta
I think that might actually be dangerous in this circumstance.
existentialcrisisforeveryone
BadgerSims
Am I the only one who thinks tricking somebody into putting something into their body is assault and highly illegal?
WrongUn
Of course you're not but they weren't serious anyway, it's just banter
moxubaozi
yes
AuntSharron
Sexual Assault lite. From the makers of Diet Sodomy
CastleIsGreat
I mean if you’re going to go that far replace the lube with scentless hand sanitizer.
ForcedToRegisterForPorn
I tried that stuff as lube once. I am not a smart man.
CastleIsGreat
Ha!
mcawesome5388
It's gotta be an oil based capsaicin. That shit never comes off and is activated by moisture.
DasPenetrator
FuzzyX
There is one justification. To teach her to always wash the dildo prior use when beyond hot sauce you don't know what touched it last.
Monfreid
Of course you can. Dude, what kind of Penetrator are you???
ralphie84
Yea, I can
BluffinMuffin
This is an unbelievable pain that can only be ridden out. There is no relief until its over. Speaking from a similar experience
pedrotbear
Habanero-chan? Is that you?
PepsiIsBetterThanCocaCola
STORY TIME
BEATandBLOW
I'm calling your bluffin', Muffin.
chromofoam
*Sits down cross legged on mat and waits for story*
KingPinga
You gotta tell us
PunnyPride
SEEMS LIKE TIME FOR A STORY!
penguin002
Olive oil cancels out the chemical compound that makes hot sauce hot, so you know, next time apply some to the area.
penguin002
BONUS ROUND if you have enemies and think they may hotsauce your playthings, olive oil has a LONG history as lube.
BluffinMuffin
You know i wasn't sure to comment my story but i hoped to get advice and then you pop up with this remedy thanks!!!
penguin002
the internet stops dramatic bowing so, enjoy your information, a shot glass full of it is good for eating way too spicy food too.
BluffinMuffin
Leaky lube and battery acid...put your toys away nicely, and uniformly................... worst pain ever!
DasPenetrator
Fucking ow. I'm a guy and I'm pretty sure my dick just winced at the thought of that
BluffinMuffin
JeremyPeevin
I mean, I like it, but I feel like it unnecessarily fucks with her parents. It wasn't her parents' fault.
dietderpsy
Psychopaths don't care what hurts other people.
NightPainPoe
Agreed. If my kid did that to me, I'm kicking them out. That's so disgusting on many levels.
Chronomechanist
Well that is where you failed your application for an evil card.
TotallyNotYourCat
Gave you your 1,000th upvote!
welcomestranger
They're the ones that fucked in the first place. They are implicit in EVERYTHING their offspring says or does.
gerphi32
Agreed. Discreetly placing some icy-hot or hot sauce on the dildo seems like the better option.
ILikeToReplyWithGifs
Residentsmartass
fault? There's no fault here. The woman was privately expressing and enjoying her own sexuality. There's nothing wrong with that- no fault
Unravelled
She was quote “being an ass” and last time I checked that’s usually a bad thing...
Residentsmartass
two sides to every story. I'm sure she didn't feel like she was being an ass.
pip1
Parents are but pawns in the struggle for sibling-supremacy
TehStoner
You know what causes sibling rivalry? Having more than one kid.
IDownvoteYourShit
Those two children are her parent's fault.
TresusIbor
"No decent parent would raise a bastard like me!"
ImASnek
AGirlWhoLeaptThroughPosts
I'd say it's both her parents' fault
Idsertian
Parents should have raised her to not be an ass in the first place. Blame is shared between parents and sibling. Only the dog is innocent.
Idsertian
I see the "mom and dad can do no wrong" crowd have found this comment.
tg2222222
Friend of mine hid porn under a mate's dad's pillow, wife found it and they almost got a divorce. Had to go round and apologise - rightly so
DeniseKlemm
but who keeps porn under his/her pillow? and who gets divorced because of that? so many questions ... but yeah was a dick move
Rapiecage
some women are so insecure, they try to forbid their partners from looking at porn. And call it "cheating"
DeniseKlemm
yeah I know, but considering a divorce because of that... especially if you have children... must be some quality drama in the family
battery1979
Once you start down the dark path, forever will it dominate your destiny. Consume you it will.