WatneyTheSpacePirate
196547
15196
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Upvote please!!! I'll upvote all comments
How Black People Shower
Post any others you find in the comments!
fachov
German people, we get nice and wet, and than we use a towel to dry up ourselves... We are really not that fun at parties.
savingmyself
Connecticut: "And then you get taxed."
0nTheBrightside
In Connecticut, can confirm
IAmTheRealStarlord
as a norwegian... then we get some free healthcare
aussiefromdownunda
How Australians shower: "Same as you idiot, we get nice and wet, then we fight off the huntsman spider that was hiding directly above us"
CountMeInFellas
But that's not even a joke. Happened to me yesterday...... True story :D
aussiefromdownunda
Yeah right that's why I said it
Heatpack
In Sweden we call it ice bucket challenge.
EdCoJim
Mexicans: ....Then we put salsa to the taco.
iamamexican
I drink Tequila
ChainsawHandsJoe
That sounds like a fast track to infection.
serenityaerin
Oh god the burning
blainetog
As a white guy, shower watermelon sounds amazing.
MettalViking
https://youtu.be/mjOJeBlUq2Y
MydeslyxiasFunnyToMe
I'm so glad I watched that. I'm having a hard time typing, I'm laughing so hard.
Dracryuimoogi
Jamaican people...den we get the weed.
GettinSprucy
How People choosing between Trump and Hilary shower
zma123456
How do we introverts shower... We get nice and wet and then step out because there was a fly and it made you socially awkward.
crazycatslady
Brazilians... Then we play football...
alssst
Then we start the SAMBA!
iurimc1618
then we HUEHUEHUE
alssst
As a gaúcho: then we start to barbecue
alssst
Then we start to wax!
TheAccursedHamster
How do Canadians shower? The same as you, good friend. First we get nice and wet, then, we grab the maple syrup.
lvslasher
This.
MedeaRodney
Canadians: We grab the maple syrup; Sorry about that.
suchacunt
How do French people shower? They don't.
mondesi
It is widely known that the French shower by just spraying themselves with deodorant aka 'the french shower'
Janedoe783
Ah yeah, never understood. Some people in the subway freaking stink in Paris (even in the morning) while all the people I know do shower..
MrSFi73
There's a lot of homeless persons, people that went to a party, guys coming back after a day or two home w/o showering...
xDRAN0x
*from France
suchacunt
You are such a cunt
afuzzyyeti
Such a cunt.
michoobles
Canadians... We apologize to the shower then ride away on a moose.
domz0101
yews
Eseverafter
Nah man, we apologize to the shower then get the tim horton's
michoobles
This is a tragedy, I know... The Northwest Territories has one Timmies.
SirItGoBoomAlot
But we remember we don't have to worry about slipping in the shower because free health care.
Cambino
I don't know about you but I just shower like a regular person. In a toque with maple syrup.
michoobles
Hola. You're just ever rich.
Waidonut
Tuque if you're on the french side. And the water's nice and cold.
ZimKat
THIS is the authentic Canadian answer.
ninjagaidensigma
Kosmonavt
Polish: ...and then we get the pierogies.
sexycutepopulartoboot
Pierogies!!
Kosmonavt
Aaaawwwh yis.
bubbersapr
But I'm the showering arab guy.
ParanoidWithGoodCause
no your not, it's pretty bad when not even you guys can tell yourselves apart.
bubbersapr
you're.
afuzzyyeti
You look like Jon Snow. Attractive.
Eseverafter
I, on behalf of all of my fellow women who suddenly felt okay with risking a bomb, demand proof.
bubbersapr
Check my profile?
KarmaRaven23
And you are attractive.
bubbersapr
Thank you for your compliment.
VladTheInhaler1
She wants your bomb, dude.
Ikilluferever
o shit
serenityaerin
And a gorgeous showering man you are.
allwehavetodecideiswhattodowiththetimethatisgiventous
As a female, can confirm.
bubbersapr
Thanks for the compliment
recentlyunearthed
ahahaha... Arabs don't shower/.
dav3nasty
What water? Turkey has it all :p
chardlz
Well of course not, the circuitry on the bombs would get fucked up
SpyrusCogwheel
Sand baths. Just like my hamsters.
TheMexicanStaringFrog0fSouthernSriLanka
I thought that first one was going to be the only one
lNeedMoney
I there a joke I'm missing here?
mooman666
my thoughts exactly
whooshby
Arabs wash more than Americans, and Americans wash a lot.
StarrrryNight
Don't they wash before every prayer session? And with 5 sessions a day?
whooshby
Yes. Not a full shower wash though unless they have sex. Maybe jerk off too requires it. I'm married to a Muslim.
AssholeTown
Met an Arab. Can confirm.
AssholeTown
to the downvoters: I'm middle eastern, you trigger-happy activist dipshits
bubbersapr
Don't you say that about me!
purplegundamdeathstar
Hello fellow brown sand person (as depicted in the above comments) I'm from Lebanon, where r u from?
twinklelilstar
very handsome wet arab you got there
FuckThisFuckingUsername
@bubbersapr We want to see your flirting skills
bubbersapr
What flirting I'm shy as hell.
FuckThisFuckingUsername
You're on the internet. you've got time to think out something smoth and then reply. Go get 'em.
WatneyTheSpacePirate
Cant edit the post on mobile but wanted to say that it has been brought to my attention that the Arab one is OC by @bubbersapr . Sorry bro.
WatneyTheSpacePirate
P.S. It's actually him btw
IKantEven
An apologetic space pirate? For shame, man. For shame!
bubbersapr
Why are you apologising, I like that my shitty OC is getting some recognition.
fellhawke
You're hot bro, digits?
bubbersapr
I need to memorize my phone number????
fellhawke
I wanna rub your beard???
bubbersapr
Well I took those pictures like 6 months ago and it's been like 3 days since I last shaved
Drakouhai
You look like a mixture between Jon Snow and Zayn from One Direction :D
TR8Rtot
your face is nice
WatneyTheSpacePirate
I feel like I'm stealing points lol even though they are worthless. Well glad I could help!
[deleted]
[deleted]
wanktanker
Sure reddit, downvote the truth
buckystaco
nice face
bubbersapr
thanks
donkeymoney
Now kith.
Elenluin1
How you doing?
bubbersapr
I'm doing great. What about you?
Elenluin1
I'm fine too, thanks!! ;)
YoWhatUpGlasgow
Are the others your OC?
WatneyTheSpacePirate
No as this is more of a compilation, but the Arab one in fact, is the above named IRL
PopatoMc
Sorry @OP but this is the kind of joke that repetition makes it lame.
Loominati
sit there in your wrongness and be wrong.
Loominati
sit there in your wrongness and be wrong.
imhoots
Josiah Bartlett to his wife, Abby Bartlett.
rmars12
The Arab guy is really cute and handsome
LordChanticleer
I was going to comment this.
Ratnavati
I'll gladly shower with him
bubbersapr
But showering with strangers can be dangerous
Ratnavati
I like to live dangerously....or I make poor choices, like my mother says
ashmenon
Strangers are just friends you haven't lathered up yet.
bubbersapr
Well thank you!
[deleted]
[deleted]
bubbersapr
Never, I don't even get the joke
AlkeneThiol
It really is you. I wish I was gay or a straight female. As a straight male, however, I just hate you as competition.
GodEmperorLetoAtreidesII
isunktitanic
i want to know you better :D
PixieDoll
Heyy ;D
bubbersapr
Heyy
rmars12
How old are you?
bubbersapr
I turned 18 like 4 months ago
BananaWarriors
HE'S LEGAL LADIES
rmars12
I'm 20 ;)
bubbersapr
Okay
TheNamelessCharacter
Australians: "...then we get our tinnie..."
Turtleswan
To be honest you probably get the best laugh with the whole thing upside down
GraphicsInterchangeFormat
Alternative: "...then we get out because we saw a spider..."
UzuS
What is a tinnie?
Flexiblewarmth
Aluminium can of beer
CaptnRisky
Then we get a big arse knife and say "that's not a knife, this is a knife!"
WhiteChocolateBear
Then we grab our beer
Lulabel73
I'm going with Tim tams.
governmentgavemeagun
...then we wash the spiders.
Toby1066
How do Scottish people shower? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA shower....
Toby1066
Can I just add, I am myself a Scottish person from Scotland of the Scottish variety. I even have the ginger beard. So weesht ya twats.
ttocswerdna
To be fair as a scot, i can't deal with the heat at the moment so I'm havig countless cold showers! I've never been so clean! I hate it
Toby1066
Oh yeah ick, good point. I actually bought sunglasses the other day. BOUGHT. SUNGLASSES. What is life.
nelshai
At least it's past the solstice. Not much more of these bleeding 11PM sunsets and 1AM sunrises. Studying in this heat really sucks, though.
ttocswerdna
I know the feeling man. I miss the 4am work shifts where i got up and it was dark
Moorglademover
Welsh people, ...then we get the sheep.
LukeSkywalkerismyHomeboy
Southern people, ... Then we get the sheep.
NationalistCanadianMooseWarrior
Canadians: ... you get the idea.
KarmAndCollected
Wales should've beaten England. Much better team. Also, Gareth Bale *melts*
AsAnArtTeacherIApprove
@IShagSheepOnTheFirstDate
IAmTheGayestOfChickens
Australian people,..... then we get the barbie
MolylHarrison
Nah m8 that's kiwis
BigDaddyAddy
Something something Tom Jones.
BewareTheCrocigator
http://satwcomic.com/art/naked-sheep.jpg
JeffStrangeness
póg mo thóin
RileyLuv
* Yna, rydym yn cael y defaid. But yeah, as a Welsh person I can confirm we do, in fact, shower with sheep.
jlrdzag
Mexicans....then we get the lawnmower
EnthusiasticStudent
Danes add beer and bacon!
aleister94
Scottish people, ...then we get super drunk
LabyrinthBuilder
So you say the scotts ain't super drunk all the time?
CarcharodonCarcharias
They just become slightly more sober at irregular intervals.
iamhilariouslyimmature
Or kiwis
jo3v
Aussie?
iamhilariouslyimmature
Yes
anon2424
Speak English!
geraint616
What?
Nikolai5
Is that a reference to the guy on the bus having a go at that woman?
anon2424
Yes it is
codylishush
Ah, same as New Zealand then.
yuyufan43
You beat me to it. They even sell sheep shagging gag gifts to tourists.
tommytraddles
How did the Welshman find the sheep hiding in the tall grass? Very satisfying.
ninjagaidensigma
Then we ride the sheep ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Veradux
Yes, yes we do.
Sanosky
I didn't know it was physically possible for imgur to downvote boobs
Veradux
Huh, either did I. Maybe because it's Monster Musume?
Sanosky
personally i liked it, it was a fun anime but imgur dosnt seem to know what an actual furry is and think anything with animal ears isa furry
kenshinlives
mutton bustin'
RyeInACan
risky click o the day.
kiwiweewee
Thats kiwis. I know. I am one.
ninjagaidensigma
I love me some kiwis.
carrotpunchington
Same stereotype applies to the Welsh. Not sure if its a UK thing to accuse the Welsh as sheep "riders" or not
SixthExile
Oh screw you and your perfect gifs :(
ninjagaidensigma
I do put effort into finding these gems, if it makes you feel any better.
Themurloc
Russian people...then we get our Kalashnikov
sumowoman
Finnish people... then we go back in sauna. True story.
sundayturkey
And then jump in the lake, then back in the sauna, then fishing, then makkara... Ah, Finland does a lot of things right.
sumowoman
Finland does a lot of things right... and then goes back in sauna.
sundayturkey
Help my country is dumb as hell and voted to leave the EU, is there room for one more in the sauna?
sumowoman
Finland might be the next exiting, so...
PUBspotter
Nac Ydw!
[deleted]
[deleted]
LupusBorealis
we get it, you can slam your fist on the keyboard.
iPooDaily
fy brawd
MORG14
It's 'fy mhrawd' - Mutation. Think about that during tomorrow's shit :)
brickweed
Finnish: ... and then we go to the sauna
LickMyNutsAndCherryIceCream
Only way how.
Carulaiffi
We get nice and wet and then we drink kossu and then we go to the sauna
pupillit
And beat each other with birch whisks
Jamie1938
I'd shower with that Arab... Might be the last thing I do but it'd be worth it.
PixieDoll
I dunno man some shower sex is great, sometimes it isn't. Dunno if it's worth my life ;P
AlkeneThiol
@bubbersapr might be up down for that
Eseverafter
Mind if I join? I suddenly don't care if it's an ISIS recruitment technique.
bubbersapr
Sure , isis needs a ton of people to make thier shower videos.
bubbersapr
I heard that I was the bomb (btw I'm the showering arab).
PixieDoll
Well... how YOU doin ;)
bubbersapr
What's with you replying on all my comments
Jamie1938
I never expected to actually find the man behind the bomb haha
DrTacoMD
Girls be flooding that Arab dudes inbox like.
VarS311
You forgot to say nohomo
bubbersapr
No not really but if you want to pm then by all means proceed.
DrTacoMD
Im a dude man, I mean I guess I could send a dick pic but that would be unenjoyable and disappointing for the both of us
LaAguaChocha
I hear that arab sausage has high status...or should I say long status
FuckThisFuckingUsername
@bubbersapr are you realy not going to reply on that?!
LaAguaChocha
He dead bruh
FuckThisFuckingUsername
LaAguaChocha
That's actually creepy as shit haha nice
FuriousMuskrat
Im kenyan, we get nice and... oh wait theres no water to shower with
Areyoubiginjapan
How are you even on the Internet? Is a missionary there or something?
WhatIsYourSpaghettiPolicy
We know you're hiding the chocolate rivers you're not fooling any of us
LordDenmark
Kenya not just go to the sea??? :-D
dhaskjdhawyajhdbsdbgwakjhbdnmcckclkklkl
pls make this with images.
theanonymousmonkey
Savage
IChooseWisely
Haha, stop embarassing fellow Kenyans, lol.
DutchMasterke
As a kenyan we have floods
PatadoX
Was expecting that to be the Arab's punchline.
CantRunWorthaDamnKenyan
Soap during and then soap after. Lol
hotterpop
Name is relevant
theotherhedgehog
Zimbabwe too
intext
This one was too funny
LaAguaChocha
LMFAO
gloriousbastard
Fellow Kenyan here. Can confirm
scarecrowe94
I'm going for a month in a few weeks, would you recommend anti malarial tablets? I might skip them don't want the side effects to ruin it
AllINeedIsMahCatAndMahBooty
Took the tablets, only side effect was sun sensitivity for me. Nbd.
LQTM
They won't. Take the tablets. You'll love it here.
ePhantoMe
+1 As a Kenyan I can confirm
L0rdVetinari
At least you have internet.
flygonbreloom
They have a decent Internet rollout programme atm. Cheap Labor.
IChooseWisely
Yes to that.We do have. And its 4G.
thefrado
How do Germans shower... then we get the gas.
playthatrecordbackwards
Ya
GoCorral
Ding ding ding! Winner!
Turbop0wer
No with Jack Wolfskin jacket and a helmet
Xaiydee
yea... no... that´s not FOR Germans, that its FROM Germans... and no one gets nice and wet there...
TehBloxx
maybe women with necrophilia?
MarshallDaemon
You skip the nice and wet part.
HitlersSpirit
http://imgur.com/lopMmWc
cookiemoonster
I feel awful for laughing at this.
annikaeemeli
I had to come back from the next photo just to upvote this.
dan543
That'd be more like the visitors bathroom
docHolidei
That is for how Jews shower
Faloopsinarb
I did Nazi that coming.
7evex
Zingg
Thecharrer
I'm so tired of this joke. Anne Frankly, it's out of mein kampfort zone.
WoeToHice
Didn't Jew?
TumblrFeminist
Neither did they
airborneherpes
You mean beer then they get the beer
darearkin
Americans: "... then we get the gun..."
[deleted]
[deleted]
xxXScootXxx
itsPixie
My husband and I decided "... And then we summon the bald eagles"
10champ10
I have the urge to somehow make this a pickup line.
thehungryguy
My husband and I decided to buy you a drink
10champ10
I don't drink alcohilic beverages. But I do enjoy any soft drink!
Bradapalooza
You didn't decide that! John Adams did. The Eagles don't fly to plagiarists! Plz pay tribute to Eisenhower to regain patriot powers.
MikeVick
Idk bout you but here in Wisconsin we grab our beer.
ImNachoBoyfriend
" and then we get the bacon cheeseburger with a side of FREEDOM."
peanutbutterandkygelous
White people..."we get nice and wet....one hour later our hands are all pruny...." I should really be less wasteful.
delveccio
inb4 someone accidentally kills themselves trying to make this meme
AuroraNora33
Norwegians: "... then we get the skis..."
OPsMomfucker
In Minnesota it is more like, "Then we grab our Paul Bunyan statue"
ThatOneNicolasCageGif
No more like "...then we grab a double cheeseburger"
TheLordHelix
I live in America and I don't know a single obese person. I also know nobody
CorrectorOfSlightlyOffQuotes
If you know Nobody can you ask him how he feels about me? Everyone keeps saying he likes me.
myrealnameisginger
Why not both?
[deleted]
[deleted]
FuckTheUSCjrShamecocks
I thought we just yelled out our beliefs just in case someone with a different belief is listening and needs to debate. By debate I mean 1/2
FuckTheUSCjrShamecocks
Call the other person retarded. This step goes after the cheeseburger and before the gun right? I haven't been doing this wrong have I??
RetroPhantom
Hahaha no you're doing it right. :)
RetroPhantom
I didn't mean to start a debate or seem like a jackass, I was just trying to make a hillbilly joke, but I did not really make that clear.
halfswing
And a gun
RetroPhantom
And our Bible.
glamdringwielder
Never hold a gun and a cheeseburger at the same time. You might confuse yourself. If you are american, that is.
chad3chad4321
A double cheesy gun
OmenRider
double gunburger
boredomboredomboredom
And a large diet coke
MichaelJCabuuse
The double barreled cheeseburger gun? With a cupholder for your diet coke?
ARandomHelljumper
2 double comments in a row? This is new.
MichaelJCabuuse
The double barreled cheeseburger gun? With a cupholder for your diet coke?
GrandMasterSassAndTheFuriousFive
Would you like fries with that
boredomboredomboredom
Why would I want fries with popcorn?
BewareTheCrocigator
AND MY AXE