I didn't know it was so hard breaking into the community

Dec 16, 2019 2:42 AM

murderhobbit

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3126

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117

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14

I am really trying to be brave. Not making this on a throwaway account is part of that I guess. My otherwise fun night ended up really shitty and me feeling awful about myself.

I haven't cried about my experience yet, so I have that going for me, which is nice.

For context, my handicap essentially made my legs smaller and that's why I am short. Doesn't really affect my "quality of life."

Pre-bed edit: Thanks for all the kind words and messages! It feels really good to have people reach out and give encouragement. Y'all are amazing.

thisreallysucks

idontknowwhatimdoing

ijustwanttobemyselfaroundmyfamilyok

Meeting people is difficult, difficult, Lemon difficult. Even as a straight man. Don't let it drag you down.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

[deleted]

[deleted]

6 years ago (deleted Dec 16, 2019 3:12 AM) | Likes 0 Dislikes 0

I -- don't know what that is

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

My messaging isn't working, but I'm here if you need someone to talk to

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Thanks man, i really appreciate it

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Dude, dating is hard in the hetero scene, and our numbers are vastly higher than gays. It just takes time so keep trying, you'll get a hit.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Thanks man

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

@op: v

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

<3

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

fucking thing posted in the wrong order goddamnit

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

That's Imgur.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

*insert the creepy thing following the kid in the hall meme*

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Short tops are hot, just saying.

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

The guys I've topped agree haha. Dating apps are good for /some/ things

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

So are short bottoms!

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Don't worry, it's not you or because you're gay. It's an every guy thing

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Haha good to know

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

I went through tons of duds too. Part of the joirney.

6 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

Eh the journey sucks. Can I get a fast-pass?

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Literally, like weight wise?

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Stay strong brother.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

tryin to

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

You got this OP you can do it

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

*insert Waterboy "You can do it!" gif here*

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

But really, thanks

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

You felt good about yourself and went out... hold on to that. It's THE most difficult part. Proud of you!

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Thanks random Mama lady. I really do appreciate it

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

This sounds exactly like a straight guy going to a club after being single for a while!

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I suppose so. Though I'd say you probably don't have to pretend to not be straight all the time. It's draining, man

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

You think you're fooling anyone?

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Haha i dont know. I think so. Im not effeminate at all

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

No matter how hard that night was... it cannot be harder than it has been to live the lie that you have. You've got this. Just be you.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Thanks buddy. Trying to be

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

When you strike out it just means the right guy wasn't there that night. Keep looking, you got this.

6 years ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 0

Thanks for the encouragement

6 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Oh see there's your problem. Clubs are fucking trash. If I wanted to be tortured with too many people and loud cacophonous noise I'd go>

6 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Back when I was young, I used to goto clubs. The last one I went to - I stopped going,a month later they were shut down for sex trafficking.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

IRL dating is hard. I wish I had advice for you.

6 years ago | Likes 17 Dislikes 0

Hmm, my other comment may have come off as snide. I was sincere haha

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

No u :p

6 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

Well, thanks for your comment and well wishes!

6 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

A lot of the gay guys I know, go to clubs in groups. Not really looking to hookup or connect. Dating is a numbers game, persistence pays off

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

I did see that, and I understand it. I don't really have a group to go out with. Or even a single gay friend, really

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

My point was, don't take it personally. It takes time, trial & error. Guys may just be there to dance & drink, reducing your chances.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Trying not to haha. I know if I keep showing up to things, I won't be the new guy for long.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Definitely don't base your whole experience off of a club, as a fellow gay man, that's one of worst places to come out to.

6 years ago | Likes 59 Dislikes 0

I am trying not to. I guess I just don't know where else to go, really.

6 years ago | Likes 15 Dislikes 1

Magic the Gathering tournament.

6 years ago | Likes 20 Dislikes 0

Hahaha god no

6 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 1

#choosingbeggars

6 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

Around here the local 'Lambda-organisation' have regular social gatherings for 'beginners'. -You might have something similar where you live

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Lambda organization? What's that?

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

LGBT-organisation; https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/LGBT_symbols#Lambda

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Thank you

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Ahh gotcha. I'm in a similar situation, with no where to go locally gay-wise, and honestly have met some awesome people through dating apps.

6 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 1

What apps do you use?

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Have you? My experience has been less that stellar on the more than one night stand thing

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I may have worded that a bit off, I've met maybe like... 3-4 awesome people over the 10+ years of trying. They're there, just not common.

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 1

Ah, noted haha

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

1 I don't know man, maybe they didn't want to be murdered by a hobbit. But seriously though, hang in there, try to enjoy life, and keep 1

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

2 being you. Your family loves you, and if they don't they don't deserve you.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Thank you. (and how do you know I don't murder only hobbits? hmm)

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Well, I hope the others are Elves. Smug bastards the Elves, they need to be knocked down a peg or two.

6 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Fuckers walk on snow all high-and-mighty and shit, while the rest are knee to chest deep in it!

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Ain't nobody need to be that tall, what's wrong with you pointy ear giraffe fuckers.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

You being kind of new to things may not have been what some people were looking for. You will get better and more relaxed. Takes time.

6 years ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

Yeah being the stranger in the room is tough. I get that I am the new guy. Just -- uhhhggg it sucks

6 years ago | Likes 6 Dislikes 0

Keep at it. You may start to think it's something physical, don't go down that path. Bad things lie down that path, gay/bi/straight.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I know. I learned to take my head off of that idea a long time ago. Creeps up, but I know how to deal. I'll keep pushing though

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Was worried when you lead with that. That is good to hear. If you're in college, you might check any campus LGBT+ orgs. Or local orgs.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Yeah I'll be ok. I'm not in college. I'm unsure where to find those orgs? The ones that the bar had are all sex and kink. Which is great, 1/

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

... in an old town I lived in, there was a few stores that had pro-LGBT stuff, might be some good social meetup groups adverted there.

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Hmm, I'll try to look into it

6 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0