Some fresh OC ExplainAFilmPlotBadly for y'all

Instead of seeing The Wizard of Oz reposted for the nth time, I thought it would be nice to share some new ones. Note: The images on this page are MISLEADING. They (generally) match the descriptions, but the descriptions are bad. Try to guess the *real* movies before you jump to the next page.

1.

A janitor thinks a baker is pretty--but she doesn't share his opinion, so she makes some radical changes to her image. Then they can play ball.

2.

In a shabby little town run by a bitter recluse and his brutish enforcer, social change looms when a homeless man and an anorexic woman take issue with the local tax code.

3.

A man gets a job acting on a popular TV show.
PRO: The increased exposure means new and sometimes unexpected romantic opportunities.
CON: He has to spend a bunch of money on new clothes.

4.

A beautiful girl who works at a windmill has a handsome young lover, but her employer is pressuring her to choose an older, much richer nobleman instead. The nobleman threatens the young man's life, but is thwarted by the timely intervention of an Indian maharajah.

5.

A struggling young artist works with livestock, visits a dojo, experiments with science fiction, and forms friendships with both a photographic entrepreneur and a mustachioed foreigner with powerful connections.

6.

A handsome detective pursues a psychotic sinner, and gets the girl in the end.

7.

A man showing clear signs of drug use abandons a promising acting career in order to beat up a man with a skin condition.

8.

After a daring prison escape, three convicts immediately return to breaking the law. Between arson attacks, brawling with respectable citizens, & shootouts with police, they indulge in crimes from petty larceny all the way up to grand theft auto and armed bank robbery.

9.

After suffering abuse from the neighborhood bullies and his own hypocritical parents, a young boy begins to fantasize about shooting people, and making his family weep tears of anguish. Soon enough, his behaviors escalate into real-world physical violence.

ANSWERS AFTER THE JUMP!

1. Shaolin Soccer (2001)

A janitor thinks a baker is pretty--but she doesn't share his opinion, so she makes some radical changes to her image. Then they can play ball.

Arguably the only action / comedy / sports movie there is, Shaolin Soccer follows the struggle of 6 former kung fu students (who oddly all specialized in different styles, despite studying under the same master) as they try to make their skills translate to the soccer field--while their leader has a rather herky-jerky relationship with a street vendor. Shaolin Soccer's self-parodying and over-the-top style isn't for everyone (e.g., their opponents are actually named Team Evil), but nevertheless has earned the film a broad and dedicated following. Definitely worth a watch if you're in the mood for something silly.

Film depicted on Page 1: Sabrina (1954)

After the daughter of a rich family's chauffeur returns home from a 2-year stint in a Paris culinary school, she suddenly finds that both of the family's sons are eyeing her with possible romantic interest. I actually haven't seen this one, but it's difficult to go wrong with Audrey Hepburn & Humphrey Bogart.

2. Popeye (1980)

In a shabby little town run by a bitter recluse and his brutish enforcer, social change looms when a homeless man and an anorexic woman take issue with the local tax code.

An early comic-to-film adaptation that almost certainly would have fallen flat on its face without Williams and Duvall in the leads, although the entire cast is pretty much perfect, as is the ramshackle town of Sweethaven itself. The dedication to the source material seeps through the entire film . . . well, up until the ending, when the production team pretty much just threw up their hands & said, "Well, we've blown the last of the budget on cocaine, let's just make Shelley fight a rubber octopus."

Film depicted on Page 1: Yojimbo (1961)

A wandering ronin finds a town divided between two rival gangs and joins up with both, playing one side against the other until their forces are whittled down enough to be fought personally. Remade as a Western (without director Kurosawa's permission) as A Fistful of Dollars.

3. Tootsie (1982)

A man gets a job acting on a popular TV show.
PRO: The increased exposure means new and sometimes unexpected romantic opportunities.
CON: He has to spend a bunch of money on new clothes.

A tour de force for Dustin Hoffman, whose chameleon-like acting ability is truly showcased as he portrays out-of-work actor Michael Dorsey . . . who decides to see if he'd have better chances landing a role as "Dorothy Michaels". Unlike just about every other crossdressing movie, Tootsie takes itself seriously and deals with realistic issues & emotions.

Film depicted on page 1: Death to Smoochy (2002)

A not-for-kids show about kids' shows, this movie is a hilariously original take on the "cutthroat" world of children's TV programming and charities. Between all the Nazis, substance abuse, unlicensed firearms, mobsters, sexual innuendo, and assassination attempts, there is indeed a big-hearted fuchsia rhinoceros who has nothing but love for you. Probably.

4. Moulin Rouge (2001)

A beautiful girl who works at a windmill has a handsome young lover, but her employer is pressuring her to choose an older, much richer nobleman instead. The nobleman threatens the young man's life, but is thwarted by the timely intervention of an Indian maharajah.

A sumptuous mix of a period setting with modern music and gaudy imagery, this film is bursting with damn near everything. Okay, so Harold Zidler isn't *precisely* an Indian maharajah, but he's close enough.

Film depicted on page 1: Shrek (2001)

You've never heard of Shrek? Yes, you have. This was about the only other movie I could find that had both a windmill and an older rich nobleman.

5. Napoleon Dynamite (2004)

A struggling young artist works with livestock, visits a dojo, experiments with science fiction, and forms friendships with both a photographic entrepreneur and a mustachioed foreigner with powerful connections.

You've also seen Napoleon Dynamite. Don't try to deny it.

Film depicted on page 1: Basquiat (1996)

This movie follows the rags-to-riches-to-shroud career of Jean Michel Basquiat, a homeless man who is "discovered" as an artist by Andy Warhol & his clique, and who then has to deal with his sudden rise to fame.

6. Se7en (1995)

A handsome detective pursues a psychotic sinner, and gets the girl in the end.

It's typical in that it stars two big city police detectives--one a jaded campaigner looking forward to retirement, the other an ambitious young rookie--dealing with a murderer. But it's atypical in that this killer chooses his victims, and their manners of death, after the Seven Deadly Sins, and the ending is every bit as gut-wrenching as you've probably heard.

Film depicted on page 1: Dick Tracy (1990)

Another comic-to-film adaptation, this one is particularly notable for following the aesthetic of the original strip, requiring some intensive makeup & prosthetic work when it came to the extremely colorful characters populating the criminal underworld of the urban setting.

7. Captain America: The First Avenger (2011)

A man showing clear signs of drug use abandons a promising acting career in order to beat up a man with a skin condition.

You HAVE heard of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, yes?

Film depicted on page 1: Birdman (2014)

Riggan Thompson is a former film star best known for his title role in Birdman (a Batman-esque superhero) and its sequels, now having sunk all of his capital into a stage production in one last bid to reinvent himself as a "legitimate" actor. The film is notable for its extremely intimate framing & almost seamless camerawork, as well as the ambiguity of the ending & whether or not Riggan might have actual superpowers.

8. O Brother, Where Art Thou? (2000)

After a daring prison escape, three convicts immediately return to breaking the law. Between arson attacks, brawling with respectable citizens, & shootouts with police, they indulge in crimes from petty larceny all the way up to grand theft auto and armed bank robbery.

A very loose adaptation of Homer's The Odyssey, this is a fun romp through the Depression-era South, and easily one of the high points of the Coen brothers' career. Absolute fun for all--except very strict animal lovers, I suppose.

Film depicted on page 1: Papillon (1973)

On a remote prison island, two convicts--one who rolled high on Strength & Constitution, and one who did not--strike up a friendship, and stage multiple attempts to reach freedom and happiness. One of them makes it.

9. A Christmas Story (1983)

After suffering abuse from the neighborhood bullies and his own hypocritical parents, a young boy begins to fantasize about shooting people, and making his family weep tears of anguish. Soon enough, his behaviors escalate into real-world physical violence.

Unless you've been living under a rock, it's almost impossible to AVOID this movie around Christmas--and why would you even want to? It's perfect.

Film depicted on page 1: Let Me In (2010)

Imgur loves Chloe Grace Moretz . . . but do they love her when she's a vampire? Imagine being stuck as a 12-year-old for hundreds of years. Oh, great, now I have to wonder if female vampires menstruate. Thanks a LOT, me.