qtRaven
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Keep the Faith
Jan 19, 2022 9:00 AM
qtRaven
81681
1208
45
mikeatike
Zixtank
Oath of a different kind of Conquest.
aThingWithTheStufAndTheJunk
ToSisPoS
Paladin of Sharess.
Xenarion
Charisma shouldn't equal to seduction. A strong, confident leader is also charismatic. Hell, Hitler was charismatic.
qtRaven
TheWonderfulWizardOfOs
It's got better articles, but they don't show as much worship as Repenthouse
MaximusPrime4444
Saints in the streets, Sinners in the sheets
DidgeryDrew
Kakashi approved.
thevortexmaster
You guys use imagination. I just discovered virtual reality porn.
Jalopenis
ArgentXero
"I said my job was Paddlin' not Paladin'!"
leonardodjik
PLAYBOYU
jesusisherelookbusy
JustAnotherCynicToo
Produces The Holy Thighble.
manyslayer
Paladin's player to DM as paladin enters the whorehouse, "So, I have immunity to disease but if I make use of that I lose my paladin hood?"
DrKenAdams
deetatron
tarataqa
A nun in the street, but a freak in the seat!
AiAmSisiphys
I'm pretty sure priestesses of Ishtar were actual sex workers, like literally they hire one in the epic of Gilgamesh to tame enkidu/
AiAmSisiphys
more or less by having her go out and shake her thang at him and wait for him to tire himself out absolutely plowing the shit out of her.
nertmert
I tried to rp my Cleric like this but my rolls are notoriously terrible. So now it’s canon that he just *thinks he’s a lady’s man
ShadusMacAoidh
Not to thread-jack, but this reminded me tangentially of the cardinal pointing a gun with cross-shaped barrel pic. Anyone got a copy of it?
Zerod
Bards are hands down my fav and most played class, not once have they been the horney type. I dont get that arcetype/style appeal at all..?
CogPrimus
It is just lazy improv. "I'm charming, charming people fuck."
Zerod
Valor, swords, whispers, spirits. Creation and some pathfinder ones iv played.
Jdbye
Horny, not necessarily, they do tend to be charming though and always seemed like ladies men.
Zerod
My swords bard was a very charming tabaxxi. But was all bout them swords tho(also mc'ed into kensei monk) some had charm, most just oddballs
Zerod
Alweys friendly tho! Exept the whisper bard.. He was devious.. The spirit one was friendly but just rubbed folk the wrong way cus.. Ghosts..
aPokal
Beattywill80
The flame is the souls breath
scottlind
Latomé
TheRealPhoenix
qtRaven
Is there a sauce for this?
TheRealPhoenix
Fire Brigade of Flames / Fire Force (original title: Enen no Shouboutai)
LiquidSodium
weilong
jesusisherelookbusy
Nephus
Step-astartes, that's heresy!
jesusisherelookbusy
qtRaven
Ahh good ol' Flick.
jesusisherelookbusy
His art is fantastic. He’s probably the best lewd 40k artist.
DeadnCold
Now that's an idea, a Pally who follows a god of lust.
Redshadow09
I can get BEHIND THAT!
Imissmycats
Succ, the Goddess of Love, has a rich oral tradition.
SprinklesMckitten
Wasnt there a cleric like that in Inuyasha?
qtRaven
Yup. And he loved to suck people.
stevanot
A Paladin of Sune, then.
fearghul
It's not prostitution, it's a holy ritual and tithe.
mrlemonofbanana
Or Pathfinder's Shelyn. Her temples are basically bordellos anyway.
ayavaska
Slaanesh got a legion like that, armed with dubstep guns
aPokal
TallGuyWithAHoodie
Paladin of the Goddess of Fertility. It is his divine calling to smash.
manulofdoom
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bgkD-GPjIRI
Kemi337
"Lord knows I'd smash"
alexstamat
And with disease immunity he can smash with impunity.
wookiepoodoo
And it rhymes! Yes!
n3ckr0mantic
So, a Bard
LaronX
Nah Bards are like lust sorceres. It be more like a lust wizard. You studied the hentai for years to unlock horny powers
DoorToDoorHentaiSaleswoman
I feel the call of my people
DrunkenMarineBiologist
I have a cleric that serves a goddess of festivals so they can party and get wasted all the time
HonestCommentFarmer
The most fraught question in his order is whether or not to wear armor.
manulofdoom
Leather armor. Black, shiny, leather... "armor".
DeadnCold
All that skimpy fantasy armour had to come from somewhere.. Just a bunch of straps and strategically placed bits of mail.
AFelineMassofEyes
Wear it
AFelineMassofEyes
ThatRaccoonGuy
Nobody ever said paladins can't seduce... or that they have to be stuck up... or that Christian ethics even apply in D&D religions
Syovere
Yup. In one of my settings, the local goddess of life (and healing and light) encourages sex. How else do you get more life?
IFoldlyGo
There may be a reason that a 1st level Paladin spell is Detect Disease. Still need a Cleric for Remove Disease though
DrJackBright
As long as they hold firm to their oath, and alignment, they can do what the fuck they want. Just gotta decide what oath it is
toxcrusadr
You’re no fun.
ICollectReactionGifs
Its the paladins code that usually made players rp them as sticks in the mud.
ThatRaccoonGuy
In my experience, a lot of 'bad' paladin players were trying to act like Christian ethos like celibacy and turning the other cheek were 'LG'
ThatRaccoonGuy
And so despite there being no equivalent to Jesus in D&D land, people would play their pallies like Christian proselytizing warriors. Bleh.
SharlayTheBarbarian
My paladin is poly and bisexual, she's crusading to put food on the table
SleeperXib
For my campaigns, I set up a system where a paladin is dedicated to a specific deity so the ethics change depending on your God
rhodesianpolarbear
A great many ancient religions were all about fertility. You worshiped by going to the temple prostitute.
Radver
You arent wrong. But bards were created for 2 reasons. 1. To make the dm sigh heavily. 2. To seduce any and everything in the campaign.
ArchMagos
Paladin of Conquest devoted to a goddess of love.
OverthoughtUnderedited
I fuck at thee in the name of my lord!
ruferto
my religious precepts demand i give other creatures divine pleasure
Hekinsieden
The only limit is your own creativity! We're all really here to D&D and have fun right?
LuxVertas
Y'all need to read the Erotic Guide to Roleplaying.. .there is a NICELY written story of a Lady Pally and fine barmaid...
painstream
YES! I read that too. LG sex is full consent/disclosure. And they refused to discuss Choatic Evil sex lol.
BeverlyHillsBillie
Christian ethics? That's a joke.
PhooBar
...And an oxymoron.
AiAmSisiphys
The idea that sexuality and faith are counter to each other is entirely a recent invention in the scale of human history, it's actually/
AiAmSisiphys
more in line with the trend for the holy figures to be the biggest freaks of the whole tribe who'll absolutely rock your world probably/
AiAmSisiphys
while making liberal use of every kind of hallucinogenic possible because they literally see it as a ritual of faith to do so.
The5lacker
3.5 Paladin couldn’t, but 5E Paladin basically just requires you to tape “don’t be an asshole” to the inside of your helmet.
ThatRaccoonGuy
Nah. You always could. Even in 2E, which had the harshest paladin code of all, there was no rule against sex and partying.
The5lacker
The fact that there wasn’t a vow of chastity didn’t mean it was okay with casual sex. That’s resoundingly not a binary.
ThatRaccoonGuy
Well I shall await your glorious and enlightening explanation. *Pulls up a chair*
The5lacker
About what, that there’s a range of opinions on sex between “Never” and “Always?”
3PiecesOfBread
Paladins can’t seduce. Your claim that nobody ever said that is now invalid.
mebe21
Thanks, nobody
3PiecesOfBread
kingrd
Paladins are one of the most poorly RP'd and misunderstood character archetypes, even though they have lots of depth to explore
ThatRaccoonGuy
agreed. My favorite class / archetype but it's so poorly used most of the time.
kingrd
Yeah every Paladin must be a one dimensional stick in the mud, similar to Clerics
ThatRaccoonGuy
Clerics being boring is even less forgivable. You burn with the passion and power of your god, go be a little crazy with it!
qtRaven
Case in point:
LaronX
Be a Paladin of Eilistraee. Being half naked when not in battle, dance naked in the moon light, fuck and get cool swords.
CAAFlo
Shame that Calistrea can't have paladins (chaos and all). God of sex and revenge
MelodiousDissonance
Be the change you want to see in the d&d world start a paladino's cult and go on a crusade to help people get sex and revenge!
LaronX
If you are the DM you can do what you want. Male priests and pala of Eilistraee happened because fan talked about it and Ed Greenwood saw it
AiAmSisiphys
I mean there's nothing to say chaotic gods can't have paladins or that paladins have to be Lawful, OoA is pretty strongly untethered to law
Avarice4020
5e isn't alignment restricted. Can play a CE paladin if you wanted to
qtRaven
This was Pathfinder. My Paladin was OP as fuck by the end.
qtRaven
My Paladin married a Fey Queen who is technically evil. They constantly try to Redeem/Corrupt eachother.
DJGnarly
Swagmeister9
Sounds like a toxic relationship XD
ClawsOfTheWolf
"So we are both working very hard in damp places and just cancelling each other out?" - Crowly from Good Omens
Xenarion
That sounds like an interesting dynamic.
macgerdo
What else did your DM had to go through?
qtRaven
I had an Amulet of Invulnerability. Once per day for 1 round. I abused the shit outta it for comedy.
mikeatike
If you were a wizard, youd be Harry Dresden, sorta
Qpnao
Cute
Zixtank
That is pretty on brand for an archfey
LordofSadFace
Sounds like intense foreplay
qtRaven
They met when a poorly worded Bargain caused her to take his sight away. Magically blinded. Guess it was love at lack of sight.
AmyBernadettePenny
TerrorBaston
(Points pulse pistol) no body has pizza with margaritas
AmyBernadettePenny
LetumComplexo
That sounds like an incredibly unhealthy relationship. Tell me more.
?noredirect
qtRaven
They met when a poorly worded Bargain caused her to take his sight away. Magically blinded. Guess it was love at lack of sight.
qtRaven
She's a epic lvl Rogue for one class. They went on a date to raid a lost legendary temple. He checked for traps by throwing a rock.
qtRaven
Get to the end where she's carefully trying to get the artifact treasure like in Raiders of the Lost Ark.
SerenePrincess013
Was at a table w/ a girl who's paladin was a barfly, who got more ass than the bard.
SometimesISayHistoryStuff
High Charisma, high Constitution, and disease immunity is a powerful love making combination.
RealRaceRiotsAreAboutGettingBlueshelledInMarioKart
I made a paladin who's too stupid to realize he's a warlock that struck a bargain rather than swear an oath to an ambiguously aligned deity>
RealRaceRiotsAreAboutGettingBlueshelledInMarioKart
He's absolutely fucking useless and its hilarious. The whole campaign is just the party trying to keep me alive and in the dark on my status
sunyudai
I ran a warlock like this - fully believed himself to be a goodly cleric of a good god who had been betrayed and consigned to history. Was..
sunyudai
in fact a NE character with a "Great Old One" pact.
StarSumiaki
Hey, if God said "Be fruitful and multiply" then a Paladin's gotta do what a Paladin's gotta do.
LupusLilium
Holy Church of Bastards? Taking in kids who never knew their parent/s and raising them to go out and continue the loop.
StarSumiaki
Well clearly in the arms of the church, God is everybody's Father so there's no loop of orphans anymore! /s