LittleRedYvette
93019
3790
196
I got myself a massage this year!
Front Page Edit: holy cow front page! Now that’s a good Valentine’s Day! I am upvoting all comments because Valentine’s Day is all about love and I love all of you. Even the guy who doesn’t like my thumbs. I hope everyone has a great day, I know I have! Another Edit because I love you: You beautiful people, you!!! To answer a few questions. The nail polish is Nina Ultra Pro - Love Struck. How appropriate. I got the device from Amazon! Only 29.99, a lot cheaper than roses guys! And obviously it lasts longer. I’ve had it for over a year and love it. My inbox is getting torn apart. ;). Last Edit because you guys are the best: I love you ALL. I am doing my best to upvote every comment and they keep coming. Just like me ;). Y’all have made this the best V-day. I guess I’m easy to please. Mwah!!
I’m sorry if this looks crowded I don’t know how to space it with the mobile app. No Return key for some places.
DinoKebab
Ah cool. Are you doing karaoke night with your friends?
Kangadilla
I have a feeling that a little Karaoke will be involved as well.
IAmDynomite
What's wrong with the thumbs? They look like normal thumbs to me... if not better than most thumbs.
smaybear
Kangadilla
HD2composer
I laughed so hard. May people realize how great this is and send you all the upvotes
Monster208
Don’t chip a tooth.
atarujun
Haaa!
lwbell851337
JelloPutinPops
Toxicrx
Musubi626
I'm here for the upvote
JUstrandomstuffbecauseIcouldnotfindaname
JohnSnot
I've been there! I meant Katz's deli in NYC, you pervs
buttscratchergetyourbuttscratched
JudgeNotByTheColorOfOnesSkinButByTheContentsOfOnesDumps
MrStudMcMuffin
TheGreatWizpoo
Yea i didnt even think about it but i was up at 2am...umm
Opswain
rovertbiggs
They hid the return button in the symbols/numbers keyboard.
LittleRedYvette
Omg thank you!!!! Been driving me nuts!
sillytofu
idontknowwhateven
she wants the D!
Logan9Fingers
MrMerr
Whats with ur 10 finger Logan?
Logan9Fingers
My 10 finger is gone.
SparklDriver
Minkaf
Dillion Harper?
SparklDriver
MrMerr
KingCornish
jherazob
Took me a few moments
IUpvoteLOTRMemes
This made me chuckle
MrSnowy
Mind helping a fella out?
missladymondegreen
*flicking the bean...? stupid sexy euphemism.
MrSnowy
Thanks, mate, +1. Never heard of it
missladymondegreen
no prob.
TheGifEnthusiast
LittleRedYvette
TheGifEnthusiast
Shit posting at its at its finest >:D
PacerStacktrain
Oh yes
PotassiumRegulatoryCommittee
brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrt
jherazob
Is that an A-10 Warthog?
RejectedCrab
Grudgezilla
GeezMomEnlightenUp
I have a hitatchi magic wand. But I need something different. Suggestions?
iBoughtThisUsernameOnEbay
a nice penis attached to an awesome guy?
GeezMomEnlightenUp
I have one of those too. But masterbation also has it's perks. And like my fella, I prefer it be well tooled.
TheDreaded1
nyut
GodEmperor0fMankind
Rip your inbox
CommanderCaribou
That's gunna feel really good till your vagina is as raw as sand paper
TheDreaded1
Girlfriend drives me nuts with her midday "i'm so fucking sore <3 " texts. Guess it's a fine line between "OMFG" and "I'm pressing charges".
volock
LittleRedYvette
Sounds like you’re doing it wrong. ;)
PossiblyJonSnow
Considering the username I'm going to say he doesn't have a vagina!
chefchris357
BoobsAndGifs
worb84
+1 for Clum Babies.
jherazob
Nice of the giffer to include the episode number
xtcmax
What does it massage ?
kanashimi444
Her vagina.
forgetfulvegetarian
Bean
rocketturttle
*whispers*
prfesser
Anything you want. It's waterproof.
waterbucketsandsparetowels
Loneliness
G1ngerBoy
Her ankles
TheDreaded1
datfandomdoe
Ow
SmolTenk
*gasp* the SLUT
MMAgCh
That absolute strumpet!
LittleRedYvette
Achy muscles..
KreatorX1
Stupid question: Does this actually help sore muscles?
getotterhere
TedTheMan
All of them.
SmolTenk
Satherian
Like, a back?
BearPerson
Sure, when you need it to. Not too bad at it either. Who's to say these things can only have one function?
Headstereo
Achy hearts also
KaasBoom
A heart is technically already a muscle..
LittleRedYvette
You got that right!
Headstereo
Lol it is cheaper than roses
galspanic
My wife and I are always looking for toys that stand up to our... needs? You should post a product review and more info.
LittleRedYvette
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B010GLYPW6/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_5AhHAb4J91SSX. I’ve had it for a year and I love it!
galspanic
$30?!? We go through Lelos about once a year. This is 1/4 the cost.
galspanic
Not like "pics of you using it" if that's what you thought I meant. I really mean a product review.
Somethinginthewoodshed
Nice try
alsoAzrael
I am scandalized, SCANDALIZED I say.
somethingaboutllamas
*coughslelosonacruisecough* Owner and absolutely lover.
itsChuckles
hitachi wand. wife gives it a solid 5/7.
galspanic
Not a good review. Missing “So loud it wakes up the kids... the neighbors’ kids.” Have one. Can’t use it.
Somethinginthewoodshed
Anything’s a dildo if you are brave enough. Oh wait ......
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[deleted]
hippocampus
dildos can vibrate, but not every vibrator is a dildo. e.g. see pic above.
Somethinginthewoodshed
Mine does. It’s multi functional
[deleted]
[deleted]
Somethinginthewoodshed
Like I said. Press a button and it’s a dildo. Press another and it’s a vibe. Press another and it pours me a beer :)
Somethinginthewoodshed
Also, what you call your vibrator when it ain’t vibrating? Back scratcher?
ProfessorThicc
Tape it to a washing machine
Mccorny
Put a towel down ( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)
whistlebuzz
That good huh?
cruz222h
[deleted]
[deleted]
whatbuttondoipush
We're talking about humans, not sheep
theoneandonlyMD
Put 2 towels down.
VitusApollo
You imply that I care?
DanteHicks79
Why you gotta take the piss, squire?
MrNlceGuy
Oh shit does this mean I have a pee fetish?
Kavrae
It's a combination of various fluids plus whatever's int he bladder at the time. First time? A part of the mixture will be. After that? No.
Tonberryc
Tofubutton
Who said anything about squirting? When my girl cums she drips down my balls all over the bed.
onefaller
it not pee, though it does come out of the urethra.
FartGarfunkle
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Nice
[deleted]
[deleted]
[deleted]
[deleted]
jackburnt
But most are a pooldle
MmMerrifield
most that think that they can't just haven't yet.
grimwyrd
36roentgen
Some are a blastoise
whistlebuzz
Poor child... it’ll happen, fear not
[deleted]
[deleted]
whistlebuzz
I was taking to your girlfriend
caramelballoffur
ZAPZAPMOTHAFUCKA
Poor girlfriend :/
KernalMustard
Wot happened
Billybologna
SlanderBox
The most interesting doll in the world.
Lamanch
Yaysh
ThisGuyHere
NATA5
Billybologna
NATA5
Billybologna
funkmoth
How come dude hardly show off their sex toys? Where all the rubber asses, flesh lights, and... and... idk what else?
iCanAssureYouThisIsNotHitler
I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that most men don't own sex toys
Stephalopods
when women do it it's sensual, when men do it it's disgusting /s
RemainsspacebarUnknown
maybe its just me, but having tried some of them. i dont get much out of it. usually just end up sticking to the old fashion way.
BinxTheCat
If i had an endoscope, id show you my vibrator...1 in a million chance, doc..
cpnbeeb
These toys also work on men. That said: A combination of societal expectations of what makes a man a man and incredibly fragile masculinity.
atarujun
Actually a very provocative question. I happily shop toys with my gurl, for her. All sex positivy. But shop latex butthole for me? No way.
minant
Greenman1730
Ok, what the tell is this?
minant
It’s a Tenga “Flip Hole”, opened up. (Black model — there are also at least red and white alternatives, with different layouts inside.)
tdvideo
Fine, here! Have a look at mine. I've had it a long time and its gotten me through some lonely times.
TouchThaFishyyy
That's a nice hand you have there
RemainsspacebarUnknown
i have the same brand. can recommend.
rvcaptn
I have the same one what are the chances
tdvideo
I thought mine felt a little different the last few times I used it! Now it all makes sense!!
rvcaptn
but no homo as you used my hand to fist your cock
Somethinginthewoodshed
mk 1, lasts a life time
tdvideo
Unless you're a Skywalker.
Somethinginthewoodshed
Let’s just take a moment of respect for the man that lost his wanking hand whilst fighting his father. Freud... you got anything to say ????
MartialLol
Reverse the master key/shitty lock argument. Man + sex toy = he can't find a real partner. Woman + toy = satisfaction, but "not slutty". 1/2
MartialLol
Just a theory, but I'm guessing it's hard to find dudes willing to talk about their toys outside of kink groups.
MrBinns
I gotta a hand and some coconut oil.
Kirby9890
Probably because people are scared of being judged badly by people they see regularly. Strangers on the internet though? Bingo! Story time:
Kirby9890
One time I accidentally left a bright red suction dildo on stuck wall of the shower and then 5 minutes later my best (female) friend used
Kirby9890
the bathroom and I had the sudden realisation I left it in there but when I sheepishly tried to bring it up with them by saying did they
InboxMeYourSoles
I haven't heard a lot of good things about the Shibari brand ones.
LittleRedYvette
Gets the job done. Doesn’t ask for a sandwich after.
vigothecruel
So what brand DOES ask for a sandwich after, because that would be the perfect gift for someone I know.
Shittyperson
Brandon
InboxMeYourSoles
Definitely a plus! I tend to need bigger ones for what I use them for, but as long as it works.
TheAnswerWasAlwaysMoreLube
"what I use them for" intriguing..
Paoloc0mments
MechaNinja
@OP Does that thing make less noise than a hitachi? My wife needs one she can use while the kids are awake.
Madomasi
You have brought dishonour to your family!
atarujun
There is only The One. Hitachi. Be afraid, ladies.
MechaNinja
Hitachi actually spun it off into a separate company because they didn't want to be associated with sex toys.
LittleRedYvette
Depends on the mode you set it on. But even the strongest isn’t that loud.
MechaNinja
Maybe we ended up with a bad one. It ... rattles, has since the day I bought it for her. Not like the vibration sound.
MechaNinja
You know now that I think about it, they don't sound like that in the pornos. I must have gotten a bad one. Thanks, @OP.
LittleRedYvette
Anytime!