eastbayrae
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Mar 7, 2015 3:15 PM
eastbayrae
575333
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198
AgamemnonsMemes
That last one is important. Lots of people (news) push how violent and dangerous he world is. We live in the safest period in history.
jacerracer
Much better than that Foul Fact Frog
theartistformerlyknownasemnp3
I love it when Imgur teaches me things
polocksneedhugstoo
Today I learned , elephants are good people.
diddleyhole
I really hope the U.S. Accepted the blessed cows for some reason. It's the little things that count.
timelydemise
I had a masai tribe visit my school once. They have form of dance that is jumping and they are very good at it
twentyfiveandone
How the fuck you know that cow got a best friend?
lionoil
Cows are very social. Someone found that separating cows from specific other cows in the herd stressed them out A LOT. Not just friends BFFS
RecentlyvotedtheWorstDressedSentientBeingintheKnownUniverse
I bet they made sweet mouse love
zxms
Fun fact: Mickey & Minnie's voice actors admitted to using the voices when making love:
YesMrScorpion
I briefly was confused which name was the dog's and which was the elephant's. "Damn, that's a strong dog."
NationalistCanadianMooseWarrior
Or just a really tiny elephant.
itsmesteve
Squirrels are idiots
NationalistCanadianMooseWarrior
*forgets where the keys were placed 10 seconds ago*
HeyItsFen
The Masai one is worth explaining. The Masai people don't have a monitary system of wealth, they are instead measured in wealth by...
HeyItsFen
Their number of children and cows. Cows are one of the most important resources to the Masai, they did more than give their wealth...
HeyItsFen
That particular tribe was willing to make a very important sacrifice for us.
dangerousDoc
To the front page with you and your heartwarming bull
ballsoffire
To be fair though, dolphins have also been known to violently rape.
thor0486
So have people.
bobbi21
And as a species, I'd say humans kinda suck too.
ohsillyus
Suck whether they want to or not.
SeanBeansReanimatedCorpse
That penguin is more accomplished than me.
NationalistCanadianMooseWarrior
That penguin is probably more accomplished than most people.
BTkang
[citation needed]
BaseDeltaZero
Am Scottish, can confirm on unicorn.
Volimar
Even the unicorn is like. "Really, Scotland?"
KrustyPartiallyGelatinatedNonDairyGumBasedBeverage
I believe it was given to them by the English to represent their imaginary claim to the throne
Alah2
The unicorn in celtic mythology pre-dates England as a country. Celts celebrated it for a long time before it was on the coat of arms.
ImmortalAzrael
What did that penguin do?
SataSalamaa
Exactly the question I came to ask, too!
KrustyPartiallyGelatinatedNonDairyGumBasedBeverage
Moved to Edinburgh zoo and looked down on the other penguins
waterchestnutIII
Yes, I must know more about this penguin's bravery!
krunchi
The phrasing of the last one somehow makes it seem like equality is a major problem. Or is it just me?
Catumi
You read it correctly.
Aumpa
Oh yeah, should be "inequality" as the problem that's getting better.
iAmNotADuck
Apparently a lot of countries have mythical animals as the national animal: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_national_animals
imfeelingskinnytony
that was a cool read, thank you
slipstream222
Who says they are mythical - you should holiday in Scotland and check for yourself - Haggis breeding season is August, and the best weather
slipstream222
Only kidding - the weather is awful all year round
Punnilingus
I don't give a shit about humans, I want an elephant to mourn me when I die.
WhoPaidForThisFloor
Don't worry, I'm sure your mom will be sad.
Volreed
They are magnificent creatures & we are nothing but a bunch of fucktards for letting them being endangered by our own species.
Pinoniemi
I got so bummed out thinking about the second that elephant found his dead friend
Aveira
Tarra lives over at the Elephant Santuary in Tennessee. She still goes to visit Bella's grave, but is comforted by her ele friends.
sweetbeatdown
Thats amazing! Im close enough to pay Tara a visit. Google here i come!!
Swordos
Blind people can smile because its a reflex.
skygodess
IIRC, they also gesture with their hands while talking.
kharmatika
I think it was just a commentary on nature vs nurture, showing that smiling is an example of nature.
demiandub
Hah! Evolution suckers!
WhimsicalCalamari
The more interesting fact: blind people have similar smiles to their parents, showing that facial expressions are more genetic than learned.
legru
bc smiling is a muscular reflex, am I guessing right?
FortheChellofit
Will use this for drawing.
DoYouLikeApples
squirrels -> lose nuts -> trees grow -> oxygen -> we breath better because of squirrels
mkjnx
Squirrels lose nuts; you are not going to believe what happens next
eromitlab
Linemen hate him! Learn more about this (1) weird trick
Felman
Losing our nuts = life
Thekingofbeans
More trees -> More ents -> Greater chance of ent attacks -> Less orcs -> Less super awesome orc battles -> squirrels ruin all the fun
SgtCookie111
Less Orcs -> Lower manpower for the armies of evil -> Easier time for the good guys -> Victory. Thanks Squirrels.
Thekingofbeans
Imagine lord of the rings online during peace time! It would just be a "life without indoor pluming" simulator!
projectiledysfunction
more trees -> more squirrels -> even more squirrels -> overabundance of squirrel farts causes accelerated global warming -> everything dies
DoYouLikeApples
SQUIRREL ARMY!!!
kallan0100
They also are increasing their food source which is cool
DoYouLikeApples
SCIENCE!
teawednesday
Dolphins also gangrape their females and kill their babies and play with the corpses.
Anononononon
And they are known to take humanize manniquins down and rape them until they break apart in rape caves.
OddlyCantEven
Who among us hasn't had a "bad" night?
Natalan
They're a lot like people. Capable of astounding altruism and horrifying violence.
thor0486
This, exactly. With intelligence comes the capacity for kindness as well as harm.
xmsbeanx
I really could have gone without that little tid bit of info 0_o
XenoHorse
Sounds like my kind of people!
FortheChellofit
heretichyaenid
http://justingregg.com/the-dolphin-rape-myth/
Thekingofbeans
Sharks bite each other to initiate sex. It's so rough sometimes it turns into a legitimate attack. They're total dicks too!
Anononononon
A lot of female sea otter deaths is from rough sex. And when they can't get to a female the otter will use juvinelle male seals.
BangForTheBuck
"Soo.. your place or mine? Sorry if I was a little rough with the biting there. Linda? Oh shit... your head's off"
skygodess
Thank you for the laugh. Now I must remove Pepsi from my monitor and keyboard.
asharkwithfeet
We have plenty of evidence for that-- unfortunately not so much for the "they protect people" myth
Anononononon
Didn't Mythbusters show that the outline of a bottlenose dolphin causes a great white to leave the area?
asharkwithfeet
Thought this would come up. 1) Not a robust test. 2) Predators not sharing the same space at one is not the same as "protecting a surfer"
Anononononon
No but I would personally make the corollary of 'I saw a dolphin and shark left the dolphin protected me', and Dolphins don't EAT humans..
asharkwithfeet
Sure. And that would be a nice story, not science. Same with all the other "dolphin scares shark to save man" folktales.
AninynMoiyo
Good Guy Small Brained Squirrel.
smashpit
Although they have the highest brain to mass ratio among animals.
projectiledysfunction
lol nowhere close, they have an EQ of 1.1. In comparison dogs are 1.2, elephants are 1.3, chimps are 2.5, and we're 7.8
absolutepancake
If only they could figure out which side of the street they want to be on
ac112
What if they have a very sophisticated understanding of long-term investments?
Crawdiddy
WHAT IF SQUIRRELS IS SMART AS FUCK N DEY DOIN IT TO SAVE DA EARTH LOL IDK ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
pulvertorget
Why isn't it possible to favorite comments!
dearsmashley
Mr. Stubbs has been a successful mayor despite his efforts to use all of the town's resources to fund Mice Town.
RocksWorld
Omg! I call my roommate smashley cause she's a ho!
BassNBluegill
He gets high on catnip-water
Raelag
when no human would do we believed in cat. cat has not done us dirty yet.
ImalwayslatetotheStephenKingreferences
Mr. Jingles is there.
dennisstamp
http://www.funnyjunk.com/It+s+2014+where+is+this/funny-gifs/5075471/12#12
[deleted]
[deleted]
wheresmysweater
You sir are wrong on both accounts.
EchoJGolf
I was there when Ice Town opened.
citoyenne
Mice Town Costs Mice Clown His Town Crown?
ChancesPance
This is my first log in for a very long time and it's the result of the best reference I've seen in months.
MisterBananagrabber
This. This is an amazing reference.
TrueLegateDamar
Is this a Fievel reference?
autumnmist
dukegonzo
The penguin knighted by Norway is a resident at Edinburgh Zoo and they parade nearly every day.
danswe1
Yeah, I'm having a hard time believing many of these...
nightsliegh
The penguin thing is real or atleast the knighting part i dont know about the parade
MothafuckinPancakes
Live in Edinburgh. Can confirm penguin parade!
skelekittycat
Last time I went it wasn't on because they were renovating. It made me sad.
EnterDMZ
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nils_Olav
HomelessToddler
Me too but I researched the ones I didn't believe, it seems checks out.
BaNaNaNaNaNaNaNaNaNaNaNaNaNaNaNaBATMAN
The penguin one is definitely true.
skelekittycat
It's his descendants, at this stage. The original I believe may have passed away some time ago?
ZedZaw
Yeah but he's still technically Nils Olav, he "lives on" in his descendant :)
TheAnswerWasAlwaysMoreLube
I was a Norwegian royal guard, there is a statue of that penguin in our military camp.
MetalOperaGuy
What is the story behind that penguin?
thesplashingblumpkins
Nils Olav II!
7thsage
I think you mean Colonel-in-Chief Sir Nils Olav... He earned the title after all.
7thsage
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nils_Olav
Matlo
Cuddling my cat releases nothing but fuckoffatosin on her part
ItsCaptain0bvious
I laughed out loud
Gustaflu
cats are assholes...
paintedgreenmushrooms
The only thing my roommate's cat does is piss and puke everywhere! Dogs4Life!
paintedgreenmushrooms
things* (sorry I'm drinking)
Lorithias
You make me laughed really hard :)
Bakker
That's why there is a dog in the photograph :)
afriendofmine
Ah.. Dogs ... the pet for people so mediocre that need something to congratulate them for jack shit.
nofunnynamesleft
That explains Winston Churchill having a dog
afriendofmine
His dog probably didn't laugh ... or cheer ... or do anything other than some and drink while sleeping ... underwater.
PoppinLochNessHopster
Get a better pet.
emcham
You're at 666 points, I can't bring myself to upvote
SunsetDelightOnNearColdNight
well you are still alvie arent you? something must be working
phenomanII
Man, I really should not breath out of my nouse with my mouth stuffed with cereal...
Zechie
Nouse!
Raelag
for my cat it releases snuggatosin.
p34ce
I wouldn't put much stock in what the image said, it's nonsense. Oxytocin is the chemical responsible for *milk excretion* in mammals.
p34ce
Dogs and cats have hairs around the nipples that trigger oxytocin release. Dopamine is involved in pattern matching, and reward-seeking.
p34ce
And it's debatable whether it has anything to do with happiness, or satisfaction.
fuckweaselry
It also increases the feeling of trust, not love & it can cure headaches via skin-to-skin contact
HomelessToddler
http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oxytocin
p34ce
Did you actually read the article you linked?
umpbumpfizz
"... For this reason, it is sometimes referred to as the "bonding hormone.'"
HomelessToddler
Yeah, it briefly mentions milk then goes onto mention everything else. Did you only read one sentence?
rekcilthis1
Did you? It explicitly states that it is an intimacy hormone, important in mammal because of breastfeeding and the parent/child bond formed.
slagath0r
But they purrrrrr
Matlo
Only when they are eating my headphone cables running cost 5 headphones and £400
slagath0r
:(
herc18
You know that that Masi tribe offered what was a huge amount for them. I'm actually genuinely touched.
umuziki
Cows in Africa are seen as almost priceless. A gift like that carries a great weight of respect for the recipient.
AvatarofPi
A children's book was written about it.
Natalan
In case you'd like to know more about the cattle gift: http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/5339460.stm
Superkroot
herc18
Thank you.
iwishjtmoneywasstillavailableitsmyoldvideogamemoniker
I hope the US responded in a equally generous way.
IWRITEEVERYTHINGINCAPS
YES, THE US PROMISED TO NOT INVADE THEM EVEN IF OIL WAS FOUND ON THEIR LAND.
iwishjtmoneywasstillavailableitsmyoldvideogamemoniker
WE ARE THE BEST COUNTRY EVAR!
afriendofmine
Your name was so relevant. Also your comment made me chuckle, have your +1.
Natalan
"...the gift of a cow is regarded as among the most precious one can receive from a Maasai, ranking alongside a child or grazing land."
AlexPanciera
A child means an extra set of hands.
CreaturesLieHere
...ranking alongside A CHILD... You were so close Masai tribe, so close.
ohsillyus
Rather. I mean a cow gives milk and much much more meat then a child. Plus they're cuter. They're worth at least three children.
Wafflewolf
But the meat of a child tastes much better.
FriendlyGuyInWindowlessVan
Well, nothing beats a steak, but childmeat is something special.
ballsohard2202
Lol this guy.
Dexterrogers
I'm American, and what I have to say is this.... the Masai, are fucking awesome. Seen other stuff on the tribe, mindblowingly awesome.
TheGramReaper
Those cows were give the honor of being made into chipotle steak
AvatarofPi
There was a children's book written about the cows...I believe called "14 Cows for America".
ChickswithKnives
It was just really nice of them, right? SO NICE.
Ifellthroughthefourthwall
Also, as a fraction of GDP those Masai gave more relief than any formal state for that tragedy.
TheFantasticJurassic
I had the opportunity to visit the Masai on two mission trips by a local church. We helped spiff up a place that houses mistreated girls.
thegriffin88
I remember that being a part of an article in the NY Times that year. It was pretty cool to see people helping us, it's usually vice versa.
Joonbugs92
When I went to Tanzania they were the nicest people I met. Well, mostly everyone I met were nice but they stick out in my mind.
MjingaSana
I lived in Kenya for two years. Every time I ran into the Maasai they gave me gifts because I was a visitor to the country.
jinomoja
Your username made me smile
MyOtherRideisaTARDIS
I lived with them and learned so much. I've never grown so much as a person.
ZebraCockSandwich
they really are. my husband was able to meet them once, and they seem like an amazing group of individuals.
kgell
Well, I would disagree. Girls are forced to marry after circumcision at 11-13. Women are expected to do all the work in the community, etc.
kgell
Still they do not have any power in decision-making. There's a lot of references out there. Check out the BBC documentary Tribal Wives.
bawsinmahmouth
The men have to kill a lion with nothing but a spear as a right of passage. So freaking bad ass.
Dexterrogers
I KNOW RIGHT?? They actually don't though anymore, the practice was abolished due to the severity of it, At least that's what I read.
sophisticatedanalpalate
I'm curious, did we take the cows? And if so what did we do with them?
Iambikecurious
They went to the blessed McDonald's where they became blessed Big Macs
apiringLEO
Sucks that people downvote double comments even though they know you didn't do it on purpose.
Iambikecurious
They went to the blessed McDonald's where they became blessed Big Macs
terminallyilliterate
Hel,l I thought it was funny. Lighten up folks.
Iambikecurious
Thanks nigga
Swa9Dra9on
Imgur is no place for laughter.
Dettamuley06
As I recall the US was concerned that they may have diseases that could be devastating to domestic cow herds. Instead of bringing the cattle
Dettamuley06
To the US they asked the Masai to watch over and care for them. I read a book about it once. The book was quite moving.
redbikemaster
That is a good example of diplomacy.
ringox
I would expect US giving them 14 cows as a compensation for their kind generosity
ScreaminginSherris
What book? If you don't mind sharing.
KonaVibes
Nope. They still ACTIVELY practice female genital mutilation. Nope, nope, nope.
jiggityjakeysnakey
Omg get over it weirdo
KaiserinHelgaVonEinhornDieEinzige
Not only them... :( http://data.unicef.org/child-protection/fgmc
MyOtherRideisaTARDIS
The ones I lived with did not. :)
KonaVibes
Is it true that the uncut females are not able to marry or be accepted as adult members of their society?
MyOtherRideisaTARDIS
Depends on the group. The Massai are a huge and diverse people group.