WeaponizedStrumpet

1479 pts · March 13, 2018


If that were me, the checkup would suddenly include treatment for a broken nose.
I have the reflexes of your average sack of potatoes

1 week ago | Likes 13 Dislikes 0

Honestly yes though. Love me a big and soft guy.

1 week ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Not an ideal day to have eyes. Or ears.

1 week ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I need those hotpants...

2 weeks ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#25 Ok but she's on to something here

3 weeks ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

It ain't down the drain. You just got a new record to beat. Might take some tries but you'll do it!

1 month ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Nah, don't worry about it!💖

1 month ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

That'd require a car. Ain't got one of those either.

1 month ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

I'm a lesbian but this kind of thing does nothing for me.
I just want it because it is funny as hell.
Should get a bike first though...

1 month ago | Likes 17 Dislikes 2

And creatively cooked potatoes. I feel like I deserve a bit of that too.

1 month ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Well we DO need more gender neutral bathrooms.

1 month ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

At this rate Jesus will come with a mushroom cloud...

1 month ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

she's just like me for real

1 month ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

#19 I'm way more into Star Wars than Star Trek but I'll trust a trekkie any day.

1 month ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

2 months ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I found two that love me even when I look like the Swamp Thing. Can fully recommend.

2 months ago | Likes 7 Dislikes 0

#33 Those naps do sound good...

2 months ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Dude, I never voted for a dem anyway. I'm not a democrat.

2 months ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Mhm. That sure is a thing that was said. Not a thing I'd seen though.
Either way it makes no difference? Everyone named in the files should be investigated. If the Clintons get caught too then good! Toss them right in there with the rest of them.

2 months ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 1

Jesus that man's arm is bigger than Jake's thigh.

2 months ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I call him 'Rævva kannin' but I'm an Østfolding so nobody should listen to me.

2 months ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Ah well THANK FUCK for that. I'm in Norway and was ready to kick up a stink if nothing was done.

2 months ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

I've not seen a single liberal say anything even remotely like that you AI hallucinating bottom-feeder.

2 months ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

Think you'll be hard pressed to find anywhere in Italy as dangerous as anywhere in the US.

2 months ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 1

Finns.

2 months ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

I mean you DO strike me as the kind of guy who wouldn't last.
Two pumps then crying while you close out the tabs?

2 months ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

What does woke even mean? Can you define it in any meaningful way?

2 months ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I think it was about a Swedish pastor getting fined for hate speech after calling gay people cancer or something?
Idk, impossible to keep up with what they're clutching their pearls about.

2 months ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

My wife calls it The Great Eepy. Just cracks me up every time.

2 months ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

I instinctively covered my drink and I don't even have one.

2 months ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0