tapirman

129 pts ยท May 29, 2017


Abed?

4 years ago | Likes 16 Dislikes 1

How did they get off the Asgardian ship after Thanos blew it up?

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

- the ever living

4 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Holy shit, here comes Mongo,!

4 years ago | Likes 12 Dislikes 1

What is scented meat?

4 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

My wife's gonna kill me

4 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

World athletics championships

4 years ago | Likes 4 Dislikes 0

*densest

5 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Yeah, but have you ever endured a kid telling you about some YouTube video? Jeez

5 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Luxury. We had to pay three shillings a day to eat our selves whilst our dad poked us the eye with a pointed stick

5 years ago | Likes 5 Dislikes 0

Sticking googley eyes on a spork makes it sentient. What if I cum in a sock?

5 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 4

I've been using "keep on rockin'" on every workplace card for 16 years.

5 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Lost my bichon a couple of weeks ago. I loved that cheeky little bastard. 14 years of fun. Sleep well old chum.

5 years ago | Likes 8 Dislikes 0

Saucy jack

5 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

It glows with anything

5 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 1

That's no moon!

5 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Electric shaver needs charging

5 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

Now you've got some shit plastic toys you don't want

5 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 3

I always worried that if I ate and shat simultaneously, I would start a siphon like flow of fluid through my gut that I couldn't stop

5 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Time is one hell of a drug

5 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

What rolls down stairs
alone or in pairs,
and over your neighbor's dog?
What's great for a snack,
And fits on your back?
It's log, log, log

5 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

They only live about a year

5 years ago | Likes 11 Dislikes 1

That curry blend is going to be quite disappointing

5 years ago | Likes 3 Dislikes 0

Very good now eat your pube cake and get in the bear

5 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0

How can she slap?

5 years ago | Likes 2 Dislikes 0

Panama papers story was shorter than fidget spinners

6 years ago | Likes 18 Dislikes 0

And a sweet platform game on the Amiga back in the 90s

6 years ago | Likes 1 Dislikes 0